I Am
by Annie Sterling
Summary: " What do you dream about?" He asks softly into the wind. I look at him annoyed, but see this desperation in his eyes. Something is begging me to say I even have one...Like he wants to know what it's like. This is my take on a Finnick and Annie story. All characters belong to Suzanne Collins and please review:) Enjoy and tell me if you want it to continue. chapter 8 up.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

" What do you dream about?" He asks softly into the wind. I look at him annoyed, but see this desperation in his eyes. Something is begging me to say I even have one...Like he wants to know what it's like. But there is no silver lining in my world, no dream for myself that is feasible in this moment in time. So I pause in opening my mouth because honestly I think what I would say normally is the last thing he needs to hear, so I say the one thing I have never told a soul.

" I dream about being someone" I say quietly, which is strange for me. It sounds as if I am a child, and he cocks one eyebrow on that pretty face of his.

" What do you mean?" And I realize he was confused about what I said and not how. Yet sadly I thought he may understand what I meant from the glimpses I've seen. I suppose I was wrong in taking that leap of faith because what does Finnick Odair know about wanting for anything, when he has everything. I turn my head away so he cannot see my disappointment.

" If you have to ask, then you'll never know" I reply, turning from the city lights that burn my eyes and to the dimmer elevator. He spins then, looking surprised that I would just leave when I see him from the closing doors. But there is also something else there in those depths; a deep hurt that I seem to have caused inside him. But I stand by my words, because if he has to ask what it means then he will never fully grasp my dream. A dream I plan on making a reality in these Games...for my siblings.

The dawn, a pink sky with all the blues that grace the day subdued, is what signals me to the hour at the docks. It means that my shift has been going on for almost two hours now, the sky alight fully by 6:30 in the morning. I have to leave for school soon, and to help ready my younger siblings for the day. The two youngest cannot be trusted to eat and get to school on time on their own, and my sister or mother are...not qualified to care for them on **their** own. I'm sure Adam did not return last night either, and that means the responsibility falls upon my shoulders.

A strong gust of wind blows brown tendrils into my face, distracting me from the sky and pulling me from my thoughts. Now I look around quickly, swiveling my head to be sure the bustling dock workers have not noticed my distraction since they love to poke fun at me when they can. I refuse to let that happen when I can help it, even though my fellow workers make me smile. A small vessel comes into my line of sight, a bit rickety but always dependable. Three young men about seventeen in their fishing gear wave with long, strong arms at me. I roll my eyes at the sight of them.

"Ann! We'll be shoving of, I plan on seeing you at the bar tonight for our little celebration!" I hear Hector, one of my many friends from the docks call from the deck of his boat. Ben and Jack yell too, making sure I'll be done with everything for our yearly get together...before the reaping. Of course I'm not going to skip.

" You've got it gentlemen! I'll be sure to drag your sorry asses home after you drink each other under the table" I yell back and I can hear their laughter echo on the waves and see the ship play with the horizon. Tomorrow after the reaping I'll be going out to sea with them, to dive for oysters and upkeep my namesake here on the docks. I sigh deeply in regret and wish that the salt was wetting my skin now as it is theirs. But today I need to pack up early and get to the house so I can take my tests. No use in skipping for a trip I already missed out on.

" I'm off to classes Mr. Wheaton!" I call into the building to my right and I set a finished net on the pile of twenty I made this morning. He sticks a graying head out the door and smiles brightly. He is such a kind man, pushing 43 now and still missing his kids who died in the games. One dead to the 61st, and one dead in the 65th. I smile because I know that is why he's been holed up in there all morning, and this seems to put the old spark back in his eyes.

" Those boys leave without you then there Ann? Not one of the guys when you go to school?" He chuckles, walking out to block the sun with his height. I scoff at his words and tilt my chin up.

" We both know I'm more of a man than any of them my friend. It's just that I'm also an educated one" I laugh while picking up the remnants of breakfast, which were some fish bones not yet picked clean from dinner the night before, and pull up my loose trousers. He smiles warmly, a flicker of sadness in his eyes when he looks at my meal. I hide it behind my back nonchalantly so he doesn't feel the need to pay me extra tomorrow after the haul. I see in his eyes that he got the message for now.

" Well Ann you should be heading off, but I expect to see you at the bar tonight. It's a tradition and all of you kids are like one of my own. I want to see you safe after the reaping and a little wishful thinking never hurt anyone beforehand." He quietly says, patting my back and I feel warm on the inside. My father never told any of us things like that and it makes my throat tight. I clear it and hold my head high to show I am stronger than that.

He grins like he sees right through me.

" I'll be there to beat all your boys tonight not to worry Mr. Wheaton." I tell him, throwing the tattered brown sack of belongings over my shoulder and taking to the sandy hill. I hear him call a goodbye and I half wave behind me, taking to the sand road and off to the ...poor side of my village. In the distance when I glance behind I see the Victor's mansions on the Wharf, sparkling and untouchable like the sun. I wish I could be walking that way, but I'm no Victor by any stretch of the means.

So I turn back around then, looking out to the coast where the waves lap at the beach and I smile wide. If only I had time to swim in the salty waters of my home today, but that is for tomorrow after the reaping if I make it that far. At seventeen I had way to many slips in the bowl, on for me each year and one for my four siblings since I turned twelve. The thought makes a pit open in my stomach for a moment before I swallow the pointless fear. There is no honor in being a coward and one thing I am not is a fucking coward. The wind lightly taps me as if in agreement, the soft call of gulls calming the swirling doubt curdling my insides.

"Help!" Someone screams from the beach ahead, and I see a woman waving what looks to be a stick at a group of career boys howling with laughter. A fire ignites in my stomach and my vision turns red in thought of my father when I pick up a stick of my own and run at the scene. I run faster than I ever have in my life, swift like the shark on its prey and equally as stupid. When I make contact with the first of four grown careers they break the circle around the woman on the ground. Unfortunately though the circle is now poised around me and the shortest has me by five inches.

" Get out of here Cresta! Mind your damn business!" A boy I recognize from my class says when he swings his meaty fist. I duck out of practice from Dad swinging and take him down with a clean swipe to the knee like Ben taught me all those years ago. The others I don't recognize grunt in anger when I kick his face and he falls unconscious at my feet. The boy I had hit first picks me up under my arms, but my head in his face makes him drop me and blindly hit one of his buddies to the ground instead of crushing my skull. That is two down, one injured, and a kick to his shins and a swing of my stick has him grounded. I round on my last enemy, crouching into a fighting position I have seen Hector use in the bar.

"Well? Come and get me!" I yell at the last and biggest guy, hulking over me by what looks like two feet. He sneers and charges, so I dance out of the way like I saw my mother do so many times when Dad comes home drunk. He plows into the sand and screams in rage, ripping my weapon from my hand and holding me up from my collar so I am above eye level. His fist is raised to strike and I glare defiantly when he falls and drops me from a shot to the back. I land in the sand on my feet like a cat, ready to strike out of nature. The woman, short and gray haired, stands with her polished walking stick bared up and a wicked smile on her face. I balk at the old woman. One look and I know who this is; this is Mags the Victor, from the 15th Games. I stare wide eyed at the woman I just blindly ran to save.

"Thank you." She garbles, eyes softened and as blue as the ocean depths. Before I can respond Peacekeepers have descended on the scene and I am interrupted by Head Peacekeeper Gearson who wants to know what has happened here. In moments other Peacekeepers are picking up the boys we fought, and old Mags is explaining to huge Gearson why I'm all scuffed up and bruised. He changes his polite tone to one of condescendence when he finally turns on me.

"You just stay out of trouble Cresta. I already had to drag your father and brother home this morning." He says in a cold tone that turns my blood to ice. The threat is clear so I nod and look down in shame for my family, Mags' sad eyes looking into my own because of our height. Compared to her I look even longer than usual, all willowy next to her strong figure. I hide behind my bangs until I know the Peacekeepers are gone and away. I am so embarrassed this amazing person had to hear about their...escapades.

" Thank you for vouching for me earlier. I owe you one ." I tell the old woman, looking up so she can see my sincerity. Her wrinkled eyes crinkle to reveal dimples on her cheeks and I smile back. She had to have been beautiful when she was younger.

" I'm glad you weren't too busy to help an old woman Miss Cresta. Three people walked past before you. I am still in your debt." she mumbles, and I strain slightly to listen and hear every word. Either way the point is clear...and so is the time. Shit. I'm late!

" Oh sh...man I-I'm sorry. I need to get home to my siblings. We have school!" I say, picking up my stuff from the road as she calls her goodbyes after my retreating form. I don't yell back now, instead I run and hope to tell her tomorrow how sorry I am for running off. I just hope Dad and Adam are asleep and not roaming about looking for a reason to be nasty. I have enough bruises as it is for goodness sake. Plus I'm not sure I can take any more excitement today. There is just too much to do for that.

The shanty we inhabit is in my sight while the sea passes in a blur, brother and sister waiting with tiny back packs outside the door with Amelia. The peeling paint is still not a welcome sight, especially when I can see that my older sister is angry to have had to take care of them, and mother looks unhappy as well. I hate my life.

" Where have you been! School is more important than your dock friends!" Amelia scolds as I skid to a stop. Her eyes widen at my stretched shirt and cuts, but I don't give either of them time to fret before I grab Amy and Arnav's hands and take off for the square. I yell back to them that I'll explain later and hope any studying I could have done before I helped Mags will not matter on these stupid tests. But my luck is shit, so I'm sure A is not going to stand for Annie Cresta. That's just how my life works.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

My feet are dragging by the time I quietly step back through the door of my home, the call from the docks coming so early even the fish were still asleep. I feel absolutely retched now, not getting a good sleep last night in the wake of so many nightmares. Honestly all I want is something to eat because my stomach is eating itself and making a racket. As stealthily as I can so the rest of my family does not have to suffer the fate of an unpleasant morning I creep past my parents room and into the second bedroom. Amelia has her mouth hanging open in a light snore, the alarm I set for her last night obviously turned off and ignored. Why would I have expected her to actually get up and make food? Why?

" Amelia. Hey come on it's time to wake up." I whisper yell, trying to shake my older sister from her slumber. She only tightens the blanket's hold on herself and rolls her face away from me with a groan. I sigh in angry resignation, unwilling to have her attitude make me do something stupid after the nice time I had last night. It felt good to spend some time with my friends not at the dock and in such good spirits honestly. I just wish it didn't have to happen once a year...and with the Reaping looming. It was in the back of my mind all night; the thought of how high the odds were stacked against me making me queasy and annoyed at her for abandoning me to these feelings.

" Fine then, stay in bed." I tell her a little coldly, kicking off my work boots in the morning light from our shared bedroom's window. I had to go down at four this morning to fix up a ship that hit a reef coming in yesterday and just walked in the door as the clock struck ten, but she can't walk the twenty feet to the kitchen and make some leftovers. When I had come home at eleven last night everyone was already locked away sleeping, so the chance to talk to anyone about my day yesterday was , well, impossible. Even Arnav didn't ask what was wrong when I ran us to school yesterday, and I try to ignore how empty that makes me feel. A light rustling from the corner makes me tense, clutching my fists and readying my legs to pounce.

" Are you just getting back?" I hear a young boy's voice ask from the left and I look over to see my thirteen year old brother's brown hair sticking straight off his head. I relax and smile at the sleepy look in his green eyes, and then Amy's yawning visage from next to him as she rises and stretches those pudgy five year old limbs. Both have that classic Cresta look that all my siblings but one share: the lanky muscled body, the green eyes like grass, the waved brown hair, and the pale freckled skin our mother bestowed upon us. The only one that looks separate from us is Adam, the second oldest child in our family of five kids, and not my mothers to put it mildly. His black hair and tanned skin looks menacing with black eyes, just like our father who favors him. I wonder what he got from his mother? I shake thoughts of my eighteen year old brother out of my head though, because I more than enough slandered his name last night with the guys. I call it justice for getting me in trouble with the Peacekeepers all the time for being unfortunately related to him.

"It's not important Arnav, I had business at the docks this morning that needed to be attended to" I tell him quietly, not wanting to wake up mom. I didn't want to deal with her punishment for being late right now, because in three hours I would be in a pen about to be picked or not for my death certificate's signature.

" But you did sneak in last night! Annie came home late last night when all of us were asleep. I heard her at eleven Arnav!" Amy gasps, flailing those arms above her head and rousing our mother next door with her voice. There is a sinking feeling in my stomach when the creaking door can be heard in the hallway.

"Why? Why did you have to use the outside voice?" I whisper, and I glare at her a bit before the door opens and mom is there with her hands on her hips. Amy hides herself under the blanket at the sight of our angry parent but I won't give her the luxury of hiding. Not on this day. Instead I tilt my chin up and stand just a little taller, daring her with my eyes to start yelling. Instead of opening like a volcano she motions for me to follow her from the 12x9 room five of us live in and out into our sad excuse for a backyard, which currently consists of a swing I hung from the palm tree in June and scraggly plants Amelia has forgotten about.

For a good minute we stand in silence and I pull up my drooping trousers from yesterday and close the gap a little between us. To bring me outside means that she is truly angry at me, though for what I can't comprehend. All I ever do is take care of this family when no one else will, how could she possible deny me some happiness before this heinous day? I even paid the fine for father yesterday before I joined the guys when the Head Peacekeeper was waiting outside our house. Why am I the one in trouble?

" Well? I think you have something to say and it doesn't look nice so you may as well say it." I resign, checking for a moment behind my back to be sure the little ones are not listening. They are hiding behind the driftwood door, and I shut my eyes and hope they don't interfere. That will only make her worse, or better yet summon him outside to join the brawl with Adam cheering at his heels. As I turn back to her she looks as if she might implode at any moment. Shit.

"Oh I have something to say! How dare you come here yesterday all disheveled and then go out with that riff raff from the docks! What kind of example are you setting for your brother and sister Annie? You useless girl, you're always off and gone during the day and come home at all hours of the night most of the time after school! What are you doing out so late? Or should I be asking who!" She screams at me, and I clench my teeth and ball my fists.

" Oh yeah! Well Mother, " I spit the name and her eyes widen now that I am yelling too, " I get back late because I am the only one who actually works full- time! Damn it I've been down at those docks since I was seven mending nets, and those people were good enough to take me in and teach me their trades! They have always looked after me when no one else would and I was too afraid to go home at night with Arnav because of you and him. I also take out tesserae for the whole family minus you and father, just so your precious Amelia and Adam can bum around here and Arnav won't have the odds stacked so high against him he is guaranteed a slip to the Capitol! Did your other kids ever take Tesserae? No! As for your accusation of me being a common whore, well if it were true then...". I don't finish the sentence. Her hand hitting my face enough to knock me off balance squelches any words that were coming. I look straight into her eyes and feel my hand burn to make contact with this pitiful woman's face. To hit her and have a little pay back for the times she stood by and let the nasty man she married hurt us... but I don't because as soon as the fire lights my heart it is gone and I am staring at an empty person that I pity. Arnav doesn't seem to pity her however.

"How could you hit her?! Annie has never been anything but good to us, just like Hector, Ben, Jack, and Mr. Wheaton!" I hear Arnav cry and I grab the shoulder that comes up to my chest in an iron grip. He stops his charge as mother backs away a step, and I push him behind me and feel Amy clinging to my legs and climbing me to touch the welt on my right cheek.

Through the stinging and the silence I decide to continue speaking again.

" And yesterday mother, I was saving an old woman from the careers who tried to beat her up for nothing as far as I could tell. That was why I was late to pick them up. And I was late getting home because my other family...they wanted to have one more goodbye before someone walks onto that stage today. Because in three hours, it's pretty damn likely one of us will be shipped off to die." I say calmly, taking Arnav's hand and leading him inside to the kitchen/living room.

When we reach the kitchen he sits at the table somberly without a word and Amy gets down to sit on his lap at our makeshift table made from old pieces I got from boats at the docks. Amelia is at the stove, putting some seaweed bread from two days ago on plates and setting the places. She looks at me sadly, sorry that she didn't get up to defend me when I needed her. Like she has ever defended me in her life. Today though...maybe it wouldn't be too much to ask for a miracle even if the last time I asked for one was twelve years ago.

" Breakfast is ready Annie, you should eat before the Reaping so the sun doesn't get to you." She says gently and I see mother sit down in her designated chair out of the corner of my eye. There is no way I want to be here now so I nod and go into the bathroom where a less torn pair of brown trousers and a gray blouse my sister wore to her Reapings awaits me. With a sigh I get into the water tub and feel the cold chill that wouldn't be here if I had not had to talk to mom after I got the water ready. But there is nothing I can do about it now so I slather my head in seaweed shampoo and scrub with the harsh soap I buy on market days. Either way my skin will smell of salt, but at least I don't smell like sweat anymore.

When my bath is over and the water is out the window, I maneuver around our closet- like bathroom to the sink and stare at myself in the mirror for a moment. Where dirt is usually caked I can see my pale cheeks(one still pinkish and achy) covered in those damn freckles, tired green eyes staring at the face of a seventeen year old who feels like an old woman. I touch my dirty fingernails, bitten to the quick in class, to the glass and wonder. I wonder what it would be like in a bigger bathroom that isn't smelling of fish and booze. I dream for a second that I am in Mags' bathroom, perhaps in better clothes than a two size to big pair of pants and an old hand- me- down. Then I blink my green eyes and like that the dream is gone and I am still here. I blink back a tear in my right eye, where my vision swims. I don't ever cry, because I am no coward when I step from the room into both my brothers tussling and my father laughing with my breakfast in his mouth.

" Well if it isn't the little street walker herself. Heard your mother talking about you this morning in the backyard girl." He smirks at me, daring me with beady black eyes to say something against him. Hey, I get A's in school...I'm not that stupid to fight every battle that comes my way. Arnav, in his own clothes for the Reaping , looks at me questioningly. I shake my head slightly and he nods a little. We do not have to teamwork this today, so I say nothing and he almost looks disappointed that I'm not looking to give him a reason to fight us. I hear someone clear her throat and look in that direction quickly.

" We should be going dear, it is an hour trip to the main square of District 4 and it's already ten thirty." Mother pipes up from the corner and he narrows his eyes before standing up and walking out the door to start the boat for the travel down the coast. I follow after Adam and Amelia, holding Arnav's sweating palm and carrying Amy on my hip. She clutches her shell medallion I made her two years ago for her birthday, the string cut so long that it will fit her perfectly when she is my age. I grin when she kisses it and under her breath prays Arnav and I will make it through this year.

" Not to worry little fish," I tell her, using the nickname I gave her when she was born," Arnav and I are going to be just fine. Right?" He looks up at me then, almost as tall and promising to be taller than even father I think. He forces a smile onto his face, clearing his thick throat.

" Oh yeah! I only have two slips anyhow. And Ann over here, well of course they couldn't pick her! She's Annie the Oyster Slayer, provider of all the pearls to the Capitol!" He says, waving his arms dramatically to make her laugh. It works and I pat his back comfortingly when she is distracted, to which he squeezes my hand and we get on the boat and shove off for the Reaping.

After we are moving I simply watch the water go by, the land blurred in a patchwork of houses and green that passes faster than my mind can register them.

No matter. I pay more attention to the waves anyway and reach down carefully to pet a dolphin that surfaces near our vessel for a good ten miles. It reminds me of Craig, the dolphin I met five years ago as a little baby and who still brings his family to the docks nearly every day to visit me. In the back of my head I store that I'm pretty sure this is one of his many kids. Then the dolphin is gone when we hit the huge main harbor mooring hundreds of boats belonging to the citizens of District 4. I frown when he disappears beneath the surf and I am pulled back to the reality I wanted to be rid of for just a while longer.

"Let's go brats, we're gonna be late." Father growls after I tie the boat to a pole of the dock. He shakes the boat when he gets out, almost toppling me if Arnav had not grabbed my hand. He laughs at my sour expression, stalking off to his delinquent friends who wait with a bottle of whiskey just for him.

" Well Ann, he'll certainly be pleasant tonight. Am I right?" Arnav chuckles, and I high five him with a wicked grin. Together we disembark onto dry land, waiting patiently for Adam to move so Amelia can hand me Amy. When all is finished and the boat is emptied Arnav and I kiss Amy goodbye and bid the others farewell before getting in line to wait and be placed in our pens. I can see my brother getting whiter and whiter, so I lean down a bit to whisper softly in his ear.

" Do you remember how many kids are in the Reaping?" I ask, and he is already starting to smile when he answers.

" Eight hundred and seventy-two. You know, give or take." He tells me in hushed tones and I nod my head.

" Yep, and over 50% are sixteen or older which means, baby brother, that the odds are tantamount in your favor." I finish and he smiles wide as they prick his finger and he is herded off. The official pricks my finger as well, and I am sent to stand with the other seventeen year old girls who are mostly either talking loudly about being careers or chatting nervously with friends. I ignore them all, pushing to the rope that separates the girls from the boys by about three feet of red velvet and sand.

" THERE SHE IS BOYS!" Hector shouts and hugs me when he steps over the barrier followed closely by the others. His bright red hair shines in the sun, blue eyes alight with happiness and tinged with a natural fear I am trying to beat back as well. He stands 6'3" in the air, Ben and Jack only an inch behind him and looking as alike as twins do. They hug me at the same time after Hector lets go, blond hair long and short respectively, but equally in my face. I laugh lightly, seeing their faces taking a weight off my chest that has been there since I left the bar last night.

" Hey! Long time no see gentlemen. You sleep off those hangovers while the rest of us fixed that boat this morning then? " I ask, smirking when all three shove their hands into patched up pockets. One great thing is that on Reaping day, like any other, our clothes are the same quality. It makes us feel better about ourselves at the least.

Jack speaks up first, grinning cockily as he steps forward a bit to get in my face.

"Love, I burnt through that hangover **last night**. I mean, I had me some wonderful damn company to keep my mind off things. I plan on telling you the gory details later when we're fishing. Am I right?" He throws his hands up and they cheer, while I smack my hand to my face and groan.

" Fuck you, I didn't need to know the details of your damn love life Jack. I'm going to punch you so hard when this is over. You won't be able to talk when I'm done with you" I tell him and he grins before the Anthem blares and we all turn towards the stage decked in the greens and blues of every year. I take a quick glance at my brother up ahead when the others go back across the barrier and see him standing with his friends and twiddling his fingers behind his back. I wish the poor kid didn't have to be so scared, he has a way better chance than me and that was what mattered. If I was picked I had enough savings stashed with Mr. Wheaton to tied my family over anyway; so he wouldn't take tesserae and neither would Amy. We were cool, or they were. I'd be dead as a door nail.

"Welcome District 4, " the middle aged escort Gwendolyn Grey says over the speakers, " I must say how excited I am to be here today in your glorious District. To start off today I have a video to show you, and then we may pick our lucky tributes for the 70th Annual Hunger Games.". She is met with vicious applause from the careers, and I roll my eyes and hear Ben laugh quietly to himself. I look at him and he points at Grey, motioning for me to take at her clothes. And they are monstrously hideous this year, Grey rocking a skirt for someone twice as young as her in coral and an aquamarine top that needed to cover...everything. At least she didn't have any awful shoes though, instead we got to stare at her bare feet painted blue.

The video continues after I'm done with my assessment to talk about later and I look to the sky..but then there is this feeling. I'm being watched. I glance at the guys who are glued to the screen as is my brother and a cursory look around me shows nothing. Finally I look towards the stage where all the seven past Victors sit in a row, scanning until I meet a pair of sea green eyes the whole country should know. We lock gazes for what seems like an eternity, those eyes staring into me like they can see my soul. I blink out of self defense and take a look at the rest of him. Finnick Odair is staring straight at me from his last seat in line.

He looks away with a tinge of pink on his cheeks when he sees I've caught him and the video ends with our Mayors speech. When it is time for the Reaping he doesn't look back, only looks to the ground and anywhere that isn't at me. What a weirdo, staring at girls he doesn't even know. Although he pounces on anything that's female so really I shouldn't be surprised by a self- absorbed womanizer. I look away from him only because Grey has stepped up to the bowls and my stomach flips hard, bile in my throat.

"Let's begin with our ladies this year shall we?" Grey asks and I feel those nerves popping up that always eat away at me. The guys laugh quietly at my paling face and I glare, telling them with my eyes that I'll kick their asses later. They all smile when our escort reaches her hands into the damn bowel.

" May the odds be in your favor." Jack whispers next to me and Gwendolyn unfurls the slip of paper ever so carefully. I feel something I have never felt before, and deep in my bones I know and begin to walk toward the rope opening before the name leaves her mouth.

"Annie Cresta" She calls and I can hear the guys' gasps and my sisters' cries from the crowd. It comes as no surprise because I am already in the isle way. So with those last moments in person, before my proud District, I walk like I was taught at the docks. With acceptance and a somber look I push back my shaming fear and harden my eyes with my head held high. As I walk to the stage I pass all those girls in their frilly dresses and scoff inside at how they step back from me as if this horror were contagious.

When I get to the stage and mount the stairs like a career Grey looks ecstatic that there will be a great female tribute this year, and announces my name to the crowd again. There is no cheering from them though, and I see all the faces of the men and boys I have worked alongside sprinkled with tears. Tears for me. Mr. Wheaton is the most noticeable as he quietly sobs in the front of the crowd. I do not smile with my mouth though to comfort them, and know they will read the gratitude in my eyes when Gwen plucks the boy's name from the bowel.

" Adam Cresta." She says, a shocked tone clouding her usually bell-like voice. I see him walk towards me, but only Father makes a sound of regret held back by his friends so he doesn't rush the stage. Adam looks every bit a scared little boy, tears in his eyes and a wobble to his step, and he has made it obvious to all of Panem one thing: I am the stronger of us, even if he is a year older.

" Are there any volunteers for our tributes?" She asks, and I look at Hector who is stepping forward and shake my head enough for him to see it. He obediently stops and nods with a single tear on his face. No girl even makes a move to volunteer and I see the boys I beat up yesterday decide that this is not their year, the group not too far from my dear friends. No Gwendolyn, there will be no volunteers this year and at the very least I can be glad that it was not Arnav. The burden will be leaving my family's shoulders so very soon. Adam who never worked a day in his life will not be returning that is sure, and it is likely that neither will I. The last thing I see when the Peacekeepers escort me into the Justice Building by my shoulders is Arnav and his sopping wet face.

I am so sorry that I won't be there for you tonight when that man is in his foul mood. Only with that thought does a little tear fall gently down my cheek.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

In all my years of being here in District 4 I pride myself on never having to step foot in this building for any reason, but I guess that stepping into it with Adam in tow is a sort of cosmic stab at me. Well it's not very funny universe, so stop it.

" You each have one hour to say goodbye to any visitors, and these visits will last three minutes each. You will not be given anymore time, and if you wish to not see a visitor before he or she is presented, then you may deny them entrance." the burly guy holding me says before escorting me roughly into a room on the right of the foyer entrance. His pretty white uniform is blinding in the darkness of this musty place, mildewed by the District's constant humidity. Without another word he slams the door and the room falls silent.

" Yeah thanks man, this place is really great!" I yell toward the door but there is no answer. Instead of instigating anymore I take a good look at my surroundings, taking in the rich blue plush couch and royal blue carpet. It matches the...Poseidon wallpaper? As for the rest of the tiny room, there is but one window with heavy deep green curtains blocking out the sun's rays and a lamp sitting on the mahogany table. It's really pretty obvious that this room is only used for tributes on reaping day, completely bare of anything but strict necessities of saying goodbye. With a sigh I open the curtain a little and take a seat on the couch to await my first visitor. It takes about ten minutes for the knock to come from my designated peacekeeper.

" An Arianna, Amelia, and Amy Cresta for you. Shall I let them through?" He says, the door cracked enough so I can see his face. I nod and he opens the door wider to show my siblings and mother, who look as if they have all been crying. I stand up to catch Amy when she launches herself from Amelia' s arms and at me.

" Annie no! You can't go there Annie! When people go to the Capitol they never come home, and if you don't come home then I'll miss you." She sobs into my shirt, drenching the chest with salt and sadness. I clutch her tighter, motioning for my mother and sister to sit down on the couch. They go and I pull Amy away from me enough so she is looking into my eyes and I into her wet ones. I take a deep breath and prepare myself, biting back the thickness in my throat.

" Amy I have to go sweetie, they called my name. But I'll be back here before you know it. Just...don't watch when mommy or Amelia tells you. You're still so little that some things are better left alone little fish." I tell her gently, kissing her soft hair.

" But what if you get hurt there Annie, who will kiss your booboos? Who will make sure you eat? Who will tell you when it's bedtime?," then she brings her face close to my ear so the others won't hear, "What if daddy gets angry at us?".

" You'll be absolutely fine, and so will I. I'm a big kid you know, I can take care of myself. Arnav will look after you until I can get back here. You listen to him closely and pay attention in school. That way when I get back there is nothing to interrupt us from having a blast picking rooms in the Victor's mansion I won." The words leaving my mouth feel like a lie, but her eyes hold so much hope... a-and I don't have the heart to do anything less than smile. I have always wanted to provide for my siblings, but this is the greatest chance that could ever come to me. Being a Victor would be the change I always wanted in my life, in their lives, and could free my mother from Father. I could save them...if I kill 23 other kids. Can I do that?

" Of course you'll be the one to win Annie. I can't imagine any other outcome."Amelia says confidently from the couch. I look at her, and she seems to truly believe in her words. Only mother looks as if she thinks this is all wishful thinking, and I pretend in my head that this doesn't sting my heart.

" Thanks Amelia, I appreciate that." I tell her quietly, my throat tightening slightly when she stands and comes to hug us both. I hold Amy with one arm, hugging my big sister close as well. I bury my face into her neck, bending so I'm a bit closer to her height and taking a little comfort from the feel of her. Goodness knows when I'll be seeing her next. The knob turning makes me want to vomit.

" Your time is up Miss Cresta" The peacekeeper says from the now open door and I let go of my sister and hand her Amy who is now screaming. I hold her face in my hands and kiss that small forehead, but the crying does not cease and as they are taken from my prison cell she rips the shell from her neck and tosses it to me. I catch it, turning to see mother standing at last from the couch. I bite back my tears as she stares into my eyes for a moment and I try to find any worry. I try to find any pain for me. But there is nothing in those eyes of hers, and she does nothing but look away and walk out of my room without a word. The peace keeper closes the door then, and like that she has lost any opportunity to tell me...what?

" I-I love you!" I scream, and I hear a cry from outside that can only be Amy, the noise getting fainter until it disappears. They are gone... outside and on their way home. They are leaving without me, and I'm not convinced mom is sad about that fact. The insight twists my chest with cold fingers, and I whimper before falling to the couch.

" Arnav Cresta for you." the man says again, and I nod once more before my brother, eyes clouded with fat tears, runs into my waiting arms when I stand once more. He clutches on, the peacekeeper still standing at the door with a look of what could resemble pity in those gray eyes. Slowly as Arnav sobs uncontrollably into my shirt he closes the door and I latch onto my brother with all my might. I watch the clock I see above the door, seeing a minute, then two tick pass before I force the words from my mouth.

" You have to fight for her...no matter what happens to me you have to fight for Amy. And when you return home go to Mr. Wheaton and ask for the money he has for me. That should tide you over for at least a few months, until...I don't know." I say quietly and he nods into my neck quickly. When he pulls back to look at me his face is blotched but determined.

" I'll be just like you Annie, and Amy will be just fine. I won't let anything happen to them, even if my life depends on it." He says with a steely determination and I run a hand through his hair.

" Don't be just like me Arnav. I have a very lack luster life. But you can be great little brother, greater than any of us." When the door opens he smiles wetly, and I kiss the top of his head hard.

" I love you Annie"

"I love you too Arnav, I'm so sorry to leave you with this mess." He laughs and shakes his head before turning around to leave.

" Annie, if there is one person who should be apologizing it's mom for not saying goodbye to the kid with a future." I let out a chuckle as the door closes, waving to the large oak barrier that separates me from my longest standing ally. This time I don't dare to sit on the couch, prepared for my friends to be the next to enter. I'm surprised when the peacekeeper says it is Gregory Wheaton.

" What are you doing here? " I breathe in relief, running for him and jumping into his arms. He holds me close, squishing the shell I shoved in my shirt into my skin.

" Did you think I wouldn't say goodbye Annie the Oyster Slayer? I never miss sending my kids off." He tells me, setting me back down onto the floor. I smile shakily and clench my eyes shut, breathing deep and looking straight at him. Because there is something I have always wanted to say, and this is going to be my last chance.

" I-I...thank you for everything." I say with a thick voice and he smiles warmly at me. Like he knows I mean to thank him for being a mentor, for being the father I always wanted. Like he knows I don't have the right words.

" Annie Cresta, meeting you was my privilege, and I hope those Capitol people see what we all see in you. If they do, then I'll be expecting District 4's newest Victor to stop by my dock when she comes home." He pats my head for good measure and hits my back like always before leaving, and I have no time to recover before my friends push past and pick me up in a whirl wind of yells. When my guardian comes to take them away I shake my head over Hector's shoulder and he grimaces before shutting the door again. They waste no time in starting to talk.

" You can win Ann. Just trident them all in the chest, or cut their throats. Pretend to fish or something. It's nothing really, we all know that." Ben says in rushed words, Hector putting me down so they are all standing around me.

" Yeah, and they LOVE pretty girls. You can have them begging to sponsor you!" Jack says, twirling me about and looking me over. I swat his hand away, looking to Hector for some support. He stares at me for a long two minutes, in which the others start spouting off things I'm not listening to. I just stare right back in silence, trying to read whatever is going on in his head. He doesn't say a thing, only turns on his heel and walks out the door. I stare at where he was, Jack putting a hand on my shoulder and moving the long hair out of his eyes. The room is suddenly silent.

" Well that was unexpected." Ben says in confusion, looking at me from the corner of his eye. I nod, looking up at Jack for any answers.

" Hey, don't go looking at me. I have no idea what got into him love." He shrugs. The peacekeeper opens the door, glaring at my two remaining friends.

" I believe it's time for you two to be heading off. The tributes only have twenty minutes left, and this one has one more visitor. We can have them off a little ahead of schedule" He growls, and the other two glare back before turning to me.

" You be good Annie. We'll be waiting for you when you come back, ready to sail." Ben tells me, hugging me close before walking out the door. I turn to Jack, hugging him one last time.

"Tell them I love them Jack, and make sure Hector is okay. I love you guys so much." I whisper into the dirty white shirt.

" Love, trust me when I tell you that they all already know. But there isn't any harm in repeating." He kisses my cheek before leaving and the peacekeeper is the only one left in the room. He waits until they are gone before looking at me again.

" Andric Cresta would like to see you...but it is up to you Miss Cresta." He tells me and I hesitate. I would rather not be locked in a room with my father ever, but particularly now that his precious son is going to die in these Games with me. I smirk at the peacekeeper, who gives me a small smile in return. He already knows my answer.

"Sir, why don't you tell him to go shove it." I tell him happily, and he nods before shutting the door behind him. I hear the crash of something amid a string of profanities before they stop suddenly, and dragging can be heard from the hallway. He must have been standing just outside the door to be so loud, and I wonder what they hit him with to get him to shut up. My peacekeeper opens the door a moment later.

" Taken care of Miss Cresta."

"Thank you..." I try, looking for a name. He grins, looking much younger when he is not scowling so hard. It makes him look so much less menacing really, and that comforts me a bit.

"Christopher. I had a feeling you wouldn't want to be seeing him. I remember meeting him the other day with some other men downtown. Unpleasant sort, and your visitors make you look like a much more pleasant person." He laughs, but the smile soon slides from his face uneasily. He doesn't need to say anything for me to know it's time for me to leave the room. I only nod and follow after him when he walks away. He takes me to seats that hold my mentors and Gwendolyn, Adam nowhere to be seen. Old Mags is the first I see, her eyes sad when she sees me behind the man in the white uniform. Grey looks happy to see we are almost done here, and likely eager to go home. The only other face there is one I never expected to see up close, his eyes clouded like they were when I caught him staring earlier. Finnick Odair is staring at me once again.

"Thank you Mr. Blaine. We can watch after her from here. You may go to your station outside" my escort's voice rings in the hollow space. He looks as if the high pitch hurts his ears.

" Yes ma'm, Good luck Miss Cresta." He says with a tiny grin before walking for the exit. I wave in return though I know he doesn't see it, turning back to my mentors and...Grey who is picking at her eyelid. I wonder how many brains are in the head? Is there any?

" How are you doing dear?" That garbled voice from yesterday asks and I turn away from my grooming escort to Mags. I smile slightly to make it look like I'm not grossed out by what I can see with that short skirt. Her smirk says that I should pay more attention to my expressions.

" Honestly, I think I've been better...but I have also been worse so." I drop the sentence off, shoving my fidgety hands into my pockets and rocking awkwardly on my feet. Mags goes to say something else but Grey beats her to it, looking at me with barely disguised horror.

" Why are you wearing pants? Where is your dress?" She yelps, standing up and looking me over aghast. I take a step back, frowning deeply and squaring my shoulders.

" I can afford pants, dresses are an unneeded luxury when you work on the docks too. I feel as if food is more important than a long piece of fabric." I tell her pointedly, and she looks me in the eye like she doesn't understand. I tone down my defensiveness, because really all she looks like right now is a little puppy trying to comprehend something far out of her scope of knowledge. I sigh.

"B-But I thought girls didn't work at the docks?" She says it like a question, like I'm too weak to work amongst men. I smirk, walking over to her and putting an arm about her shoulders lightly.

" Love, a girl can work anywhere if she has the balls to do it. And if I can win, then perhaps when you come for my victory tour I'll show you how un-terrifying it is." I say, and her face lights up with the fact that I am being nice to her. It's really too bad people are not nice to her, she's just a harmless pup really, her master cruel but not her. I can't be mean to something so helpless. I see Mags nod in approval of my kindness, and I know I have made the right choice.

"Oh! I would like that. I have never been taken to see the ocean up close, and that would be just so exciting!" She squeals and hops up and down a little too much. I smile anyway, the way I would at Amy when she gets wound up about something.

"Then I'll guarantee that if I win I'll walk you down to the ocean" I tell her and I really mean it because her smile is contagious and I can't help but want to bring that sort of happiness back. She looks at my neck then, at the necklace she takes into her hand and studies.

" Is this your token?" She asks quietly, or quietly for her as I can tell. I blush slightly and nod, so the smile nearly splits her face in two.

" We saw your sister with it when she came to visit. It really is very pretty." Mags says and I smile wide at her.

" I made it for her a few years ago for her birthday. She has an obsession with pretty things." I laugh and Mags only grins wider and so does Grey. I think that the next week or so may not be so bad with these people by my side.

A rustling from the last seat brings my attention around to my last companion, who is standing up to tower over me. He must be taller than even Hector by an inch or two, broad shoulders and long arms making him look like the swimmer I know him to be. Honestly when he is standing he looks very intimidating, but I have never been one to be intimidated. I stand a little taller to try and make it a little more even, and he ghosts a smile on that heart stopping face when he reaches out his hand.

" I feel a bit weird just sitting there, since everyone else seems to know you. I heard all about a little girl yesterday from Mags, and the little part are her words. I just wanted to introduce myself. Finnick Odair at your service" He says with a soft and deep voice, so unlike the purr you hear on television. I feel the light smile on my face before I can even stop it and he matches me when I take his hand in a firm grip.

"Annie Cresta, it's a pleasure to meet you Mr. Odair" I respond, feeling rather comfortable in his presence. He is nothing like I imagined him to be, all soft spoken words and gentle movements.

" Are you a career?" He asks curiously, taking in my stance and I laugh out loud before I can stop myself. He grins and raises a perfect eyebrow at my outburst. I drop his hand, feeling a tinge of embarrassment that we didn't let go. I laugh it off and decide it is best to answer him.

"If I was a career, then I wouldn't be shaking in my boots. You just can't see it." I chuckle and Mags stands to pound me on the back a little and Finnick even lets out a little laugh. I have found a common bond with these guys I guess. Perhaps they are still scared, but not stupid enough to show it...

" I like you girl, I just wish we could to know each other in different circumstances. It seems that when I see you something has gone array." Mags says, and I feel touched that she would want to get to know me at all. Finnick nods his agreement and Grey makes a delighted noise that I assume is an affirmative, so the warm feeling grows. However the moment couldn't last forever and when I hear the door open and a woman crying, I see my brother sobbing as he is ripped from my mother by two peacekeepers telling him his time is up. She makes an unholy racket really, and I cast my eyes down and clench my jaw in anger. Adam is no better with his groveling and pleading to let him stay, to pick someone else. Anyone else.

" He certainly isn't going to win." Grey says matter- of- fact and I look up once more to take him in. I take in his limp body, his red face, his drooped head and can't help but agree. But I don't say anything in return, because that would be too cruel now. Instead I follow my mentors, Finnick's large hand guiding me from my back to the front doors and into the sunlight. Before I am put into the sleek black car I take a last wistful look at the ocean, seeing a dolphin outside the bay jump into the sky. I look away then and step into the car where Adam still sobs uncontrollably. After Finnick follows and sits beside me the car moves through the crowds, taking us to the train and I feel the nerves eating at me. To my surprise Finnick touches my hand gently, and I look into his eyes for a moment and see encouragement. I forget everything I know about this young man a moment, gladly gripping his hand and he smiles. I sort of like Finnick Odair, at least for right now...


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

When the car pulls into the station I take a long look at the silver beast sitting on the rails. Never have I seen anything so magnificent, the trains usually stationed here so dingy and worn it is impossible to know this one comes from the same place. Finnick nudges me a bit when peacekeepers I don't recognize whip the doors open, their faces covered mostly by protective gear that shields their eyes. I freeze temporarily when one adjusts a gun in his arms, a weapon like that not being something I am used to seeing so openly. Adam whimpers quietly when he too sees the gleaming thing, and Mags gives us both a look before I buck up and leave behind the dark vehicle for the train. Adam is close to me then, sticking to me like glue or Amy in a particularly large crowd on market day. For once his presence doesn't make me want to hit him.

" Let's go kids, time to head for the Capitol." Gwendolyn trills and takes the lead, followed quickly by Mags and Adam. Finnick and I bring up the rear, that comforting hand on my back again and guiding me to...the Games. I gulp, pulling myself up onto the train's platform and taking a glance at the peacekeepers behind us. Finnick's easy going expression is gone when he sees that I have looked, and I know the blood has drained from my face because behind the cameras I failed to notice earlier, all the gun's barrels are pointing at our backs.

"Move Annie." He whispers urgently to me and I force my stunned legs to push on, those doors sliding shut as the huge engine roars to life. Then, as if it is nothing, the seal on the door makes the car completely quiet. For a few seconds I simply stare at Finnick, who in turn looks at me and I understand one thing in that look. There is no escape, because even looking like you want to run will result in death before the Games even start. He motions with his head to a door on my left that is cleaner than I have ever seen anything be and obediently I pull it open.

The room I walk into is like nothing I have ever seen before, the car decked to the nines with a long table covered in white and full to bursting with cakes. There are little ones, and big ones, and cookies all on shined up trays. Around a small coffee table are five soft blue chairs that look squishier than a jellyfish, the plush covering resembling a blanket I have at home. On the other side of the cart is a sitting table with high-backed wooden chairs that look like cherry wood, the red polished and perfect. Even the walls impress me, painted a pale green instead of the metal I was expecting. Adam is standing next to me after I walk in, and together we gape at the sight before us while Grey makes herself comfortable.

" Impressed? This is the Capitol after all. I can't wait until you see your rooms in the city! They are much nicer than any of this. We only have the absolute necessities on these Tribute trains." She tells us and I feel my jaw start to drop, and see Adam's already down. I look at him from the corner of my eye, and he stares back at me. For a moment we are silent.

" Where are we Annie?" He whispers to me when our mentors walk straight past us and take to the plush seats. We step closer together from our standing positions in self defense, and I lean in to answer him.

" I think we died already. This kind of thing can't really be the simplistic version of a Capitol room can it?"

" I don't know."

" Take a seat please, and get some food. We have much to talk about and only a few hours to do it. We want you to have a good night's sleep before we reach the Capitol and you are given away to your stylists." Mags says, and Adam looks shocked because I'm not sure he can understand her. I take a hold of his sleeve, pulling him lightly towards the table full of food. I let go to grab a plate, nudging him to do the same and I grab a piece of chocolate cake with some white cookies sprinkled with sugar crystals. Adam grabs only what I do and when I have decided that this is enough he follows me to the seats. I take my place across from Mags, Adam actually pushing his chair closer to me and away from Finnick before settling in. They both have a flash of surprise in their eyes, but this is not going to be mentioned apparently because Finnick clears his throat and launches into an explanation about how we can be trained.

"Alright, well we usually have one Tribute for each mentor, even when they choose to be trained together. You will be trained separately on certain occasions so this is a very important choice to make. We discussed the circumstances of having siblings here for the Games in depth, so it is decided that you will choose if you would like to be together." He tells us and I start. I didn't think they would be training us together, or that it was an option for anyone in the Games. It would be convenient to know his strengths, but Adam has never willingly worked with me on anything. So do I say I want to train with my brother? What happens when he says no and I look like a fool? I...

" I vote we don't train together." Adam says in a shaky but stronger voice than I have heard since we were reaped. I stare at him wide eyed and he seems confused at the fact that I don't agree right away. I know what I want, even though I don't really like my brother. But is letting him see what I can do smart? Mags is looking at me with an eyebrow raised, like she is judging me based upon the decision I make now. I take a deep breath and nod my head.

" Does that mean you don't wish to be trained with your brother?" Finnick asks in a serious tone, and I see he is also prepared to judge me for my choice.

"Yes , I don't wish to train with my brother." I answer and he nods, eyes still hard and so is Mags'. I'm not sure if I was right in what I did...

" Then you will be separate in your mentoring as long as you choose to stay with this path. You both can agree to be together at anytime. Mags and I will also adjust easily if this is to happen so please don't feel you are inconveniencing . Now we need to give you your mentors. We thought that it would be smart if Mags took Annie and that I took Adam as out tributes." He says and I feel a little more comfortable knowing a long standing mentor who brought home Tributes from our District and others is looking out for me. Adam makes a disgruntled noise about being stuck with Finnick Odair, and I can't blame him. I recall more than once hearing that Adam got into a fight with Finnick and his friends in school. I guess people don't get over some things, though now seem like a good time.

" I want the boy." Mags says suddenly, looking at me and then down to the floor. I feel my heart sinking at this news, and I know that I gave the wrong answer to the ultimatum. She doesn't need someone who is weak enough to abandon their own brother even if he abandoned me first. Neither of us are worth saving and Finnick looks equally shocked and hurt. Is he concerned for me then?

But he doesn't argue with her in front us, and he nods his head stiffly before standing up above us. I stand also and he looks at me unemotionally, motioning for Adam to follow. With a smug expression for not being with Finnick, he sneers at me and stands like his usual self. I feel hurt that just moments ago he was so close, like when we were young children. Now he is the same man dad created, and it makes my stomach drop to the floor.

" I want to let you get settled a bit more before dinner, and perhaps you could shower before the recap of the Reapings." He says lightly, and when he walks to the opposite end of the car we follow. I look at Mags before exiting, and she still won't look up at me. I sigh and continue to follow Finnick, sad that I am left to the devices of a nineteen year old womanizer who is being rather nice now, but may not help me at all once we are in the Capitol with his lovers. I may be alone in this...

"Your room is right here Annie, and mine is across the hall. I'll be in to talk to you after I get Adam to his room and get changed." Finnick says monotone, and opens a plain cherry door to a dark room. I walk in alone, the lights coming on automatically and showing me a queen sized bed in the center of the room with a bathroom to the right and a dresser to the left. It's not all that fancy, not like the dining car we were just in. However I've never seen anything like it in my life.

"Damn" I mumble when the door shuts behind me, walking around and exploring this new space. The carpet absorbs any noise my booted feet would make, and I find it strange that it does so. I make a mental note to remember the feeling and learn to hear every sound. It could keep me alive longer than any normal hearing could in the arena. Because if carpet is like this than who is to say an arena flooring wouldn't be too.

My first stop is the bathroom that holds a two person shower and a large sink. A panel on the wall reads a myriad of different body soaps and shampoos to choose from. It really seems like an exhaustive list for washing, but I am not so surprised after meeting Gwendolyn. She seems that she would have even more options in a shower at home. She probably has a bathroom as big as me and my parent's room at home combined though too. I shudder at that thought and leave the bathroom to explore the closet and dresser in my room.

Except I'm not alone when I walk into the main room, there is a woman dressed head to toe in red messing in my drawers. A stranger messing with my clothes...For a moment I am completely frozen, not making a single peep as I observe her. The woman is not as tall as me, but has a few inches on Grey. Her movements are a little stilted too, and there is a stoop in her right shoulder that makes her look a bit awkward. I still don't dare to make a sound. She never makes a peep either, and when she turns around after ten minutes to see me standing in the bathroom doorway her mouth opens to show me there is no tongue to truly scream.

An Avox. An Avox making disturbing noises and bowing low at me, her long black hair straight and slick. Taking a good look I would guess she is in her early forties considering the build and facial structure. I approach with caution, reaching out a shaking hand to move the bangs from her paled face. Her blue eyes lock with mine in fear and I feel my heart breaking for this woman. She looks so helpless in that moment that I motion to the bed and she hesitates before obeying. I sit too, just sitting in her companionship and soon she calms down and looks at me with a slightly curious expression. I smile a bit, and it is almost as if we are having a conversation in nothing but faces. I have to speak eventually though, because it is deafening in here and I'm ashamed to say the fear is creeping into my veins.

"So...ugh...do you have a name?" I ask awkwardly and I curse in my head when I hear the thickness in my voice. Her eyes soften at the sound, but she does not react for which I am grateful. Instead she motions to her wrist where a golden bracelet encircles her thin wrists. I take a hold of it to read the name, Hannah, and put it back into her lap slowly.

"It's a pretty name, Hannah. I knew a girl from my District by that name. She was in my sister's group of friends before moving to the main town with her fiancée." I tell her, a little more confidence oozing into me while I talk of home. Her face brightens a bit at the information, then she is pointing to my wrist...and I think she wants to know my name. I grin.

" I'm Annie. Annie Cresta." I say and she makes this delighted noise that I assume is good because she looks fine. I laugh at it, happy that she is not treating me either like a career or apparently a lost cause. She is acting like a...like a friend. And I find myself unable to keep the next question inside.

" Will you be with us in the Capitol as well? Will you stay the entire time?" And even I can hear that desperate hope there. She smiles at me and nods her head, patting my shoulder before standing and motioning that she must go. I nod even though I want to beg her to stay, because she makes me feel not so alone. But she is gone so quickly and I can't prepare for the encroaching anxiety.

I get up quickly after that, taking strides to the dresser where I find dresses of all kinds and colors. I grimace and dig like mad, finally finding a pair of pants in the bottom with a regular shirt I would wear to work at home. I think I might like to take a shower, to calm the panic I feel rising like bile. It is burning holes in my mask and I don't like that one bi,t so with the clothes in hand I punch the big red W on the water panel and strip from my Reaping outfit.

When I step in under the spray I find to my relief that the water is very comfortable, and realize that there is another panel in here with the same selection of soaps and shampoos as outside. I'll have to ask Finnick about that when he comes, but for now I choose a seaweed soap and honey shampoo that I am curious about. They both spray one by one from the shower head, water in between to rinse and I scrunch my eyes shut in surprise. In moments I am clean as can be, and waste no time in stepping out onto a dryer. I yelp when the air catches me, jumping off and grabbing instead a soft towel from the rack. Then I toss on the blue jean pants and grey shirt, putting the shell around my neck and grabbing my outfit to leave on my bed.

There is no one I can see from a cursory glance before I step out of the bathroom, but there is a soft knock on the door when I have set my things down and debated on leaving the room. It opens without my consent to reveal my mentor, now changed into a too tight shirt that shows off his muscles and a pair of pants that look glued to him. The Finnick I have seen on TV for five years is standing before me, the one I met this afternoon long gone. He gives me the classic smirk before shutting the door, and I feel any hope I had of having him help me in the Capitol drain from my body. He is the boy everyone describes in that moment, the one who has abandoned his tributes before. I want the young man I met earlier to come back.

"The Avox told me you had gotten into the shower when she came in to tell you it was time to eat. I figured I would just wait until I heard you moving around." He says and his voice has changed drastically. I glare and square my shoulders. I don't trust this Capitol playboy one bit, not anymore that I realize the earlier him was likely a lie.

"**Hannah** is very nice to think to tell me." I emphasize her name and he raises those eyebrows cockily, grinning arrogantly and I feel sad . He made me feel so safe... but this Finnick is making the hairs on my neck stand on end.

" Well it's her job, and you would do well to remember that love." He laughs and I bristle at the use of the nickname.

" You can't call me that, only my friends call me that." I bite back, and he chuckles as the sadness of Jack being so far away washes over me. I wish he were here right now, to be a barrier between me and this stranger.

" Fine then sugar, I can call you that can't I?" He asks me with a winning smile.

" You can call me Annie." I almost growl, irritated by his very Capitol like presence. I see something flash in those eyes of his, almost as if he regrets my tone before the sexy spark is back.

"Well **Annie**, we need to go eat and watch the recaps." I don't miss how he hits heavy on my name this time before swooping out the door and holding it open for me. I don't let any emotion onto my face, and walk right past him down to the door I know leads to the car we were in before. He follows much to close behind, that hand on my back no longer comforting but sending an unpleasant chill up my spine. When the door opens I take off for Mags, who is looking at me now in pity and Finnick in annoyance. She motions for me to take the empty seat next to her, next to Grey who sits on my other side. She must have read my discomfort from the other side of the room.

"Thought you weren't going to show sis." Adam says from across the table. I only shrug, not wanting to talk to him anymore than I want to talk to my mentor. I feel so isolated that it is almost hard to concentrate. Then the hand on my shoulder brings me back into myself and I see the bracelet of gold. Hannah.

"Eat up Annie, you're going to need to have some meat on you when you go into the Arena" Mags mumbles and I look at the meal Hannah set in front of me. The plate is piled high with mashed potatoes and a filet of Red Snapper, a delicacy even in District 4 with most if not all going to the Capitol. On the side of my plate is a still steaming roll that I slather in butter, watching from my peripheral as Adam leaves behind silverware and devours his meal. He talks too, to the others, and I sit by and listen as the conversation unfolds before me.

" So what are we supposed to get from you anyway? What will we learn from you that we won't in training?" He shoots at mainly Finnick who subtly glares. I am not so amazed that now after the initial shock is over Adam would become his old self again. In my heart I knew the kid who got on the train with me was never going to stay.

"Well boy we tell you strategies, and get you sponsors so you have food in the Games. We also make your alliances when they are suggested by other Districts." Mags says a little sourly and I grin into my mouthful of fish, keeping my head low and ears perked at the ready.

" So then Mentor, how do I start a fire?" He sends back at her and I wonder if he means to sound as disrespectful as he does. The sneer tells me that that is a yes.

" You could start a fire just by breathing on dry tinder you're so full of hot air." Finnick remarks and I look up to see his eyes meeting mine with a joyous look in them. I give a tiny smile before looking at Mags' disapproving glare.

"That's enough out of you son, and as for you boy you can learn how to start a fire when I decide to tell you. Now eat your food." She orders and they both look crestfallen, though Finnick has a look in his eye that says, really, he isn't all that fazed. I go back to eating when Grey takes over the conversation and starts on about Capitol fashion. The rest of the table stays silent as she goes on for the rest of the meal.

When the table is cleared we move to a new car with a television, a couch, and a chair. I take a seat on the floor and offer my space to Mags who takes it gratefully, Grey sitting down next to her and Adam taking the comfy looking chair. I don't miss the smile Finnick sends my way when he sits next to me, rather close considering there is a lot of floor to partake in. I don't get the chance to ask why he's so in my space though when the TV comes to life with Caesar Flickerman gracing the glass. I don't really listen to the introduction, and watch closely when District 1 comes on the screen. Two volunteers that are eighteen come up, the boy huge and blond where the girl is pretty limber looking with blonde hair as well. I make note of them and the underlying viciousness I see there in the depths of black eyes. They are another brother and sister team according to Flickerman.

District two is scary as usual, though I am surprised that when a fifteen year old girl is reaped no one takes her place. The boy is eighteen and a volunteer, taking his place next to the black haired girl with enthusiasm. Lack of fear on both faces makes me want to run. There is something wrong with the both of them, something that even the first two tributes didn't have. Especially in the girl, who even seems to unsettle the monster beside her after a few minutes. I put her at the top of the list quickly and remember to stay away from that girl.

The tributes of three pass with a twelve year old and a fifteen year old who look eight. Then next comes our District and I am surprised how much a career I truly look. I look just as menacing as the careers this year, but I lack the coldness in my eyes. Particularly when you can see the pain I have in them. Five comes and goes with a twelve year old boy and an eighteen year old girl who glares and all but snarls at him. I automatically don't like her.

District six too passes with two eighteen year olds I don't take much stock of, and when we get to District seven there is a huge eighteen year old boy. He is almost bigger than the beast from District 2 and the girl with him is a little more muscular than me and also the same age . Another seventeen year old is chosen from eight, the girl, and a sixteen year old boy who looks strikingly like Adam but for his brown hair. Nine and ten yield a mixture of kids sixteen to eighteen and all rather impressive in build. It is not until Eleven that I gape in horror, because the fourteen year old girl is without an arm and the sixteen year old boy is bigger than the boy from two and seven combined. The Reapings then end with two fifteen year olds as round as a toothpick from twelve, and I feel my heart breaking when their ashen faces pass before my eyes.

Then the screen goes black with just the seal of the Capitol before turning off completely.

"Doesn't look like there are many younger kids this year." Adam states, nervousness coloring his sneering tone. I noticed that as well, which means our competition is going to be on our same playing field. That doesn't bode well in our favor, particularly with the career pack looking so put together and the other Districts having promising looking tributes as well.

" It's true, but younger kids than you have beaten those odds. I think you both have a decent chance at this." Finnick throws back and I know he is talking about himself. He was the youngest in his Games five years ago, and the look on his face tells me he is still oh so proud of that. Well if pretty boy can do it, then so can I. Especially since he was the youngest to ever **win **at all.

" Yeah Odair, well we aren't all as beautiful as you. You got out because of sponsors." Adam spits back, standing up and leaving the room.

I watch him go, debating on following but Mags' weathered hand on my shoulder holds me down for a moment. I stay until I hear his door close, and then the hand is lifted and Finnick pulls me up to stand beside the old Victor. She stares up into my eyes and I can see Grey getting uncomfortable with the silence in the room. I am too but I never break eye contact, and I never say a word. I just read what she is telling me with those wizened eyes. And I know what she wants to tell me when she can't use words. I get the message loud and clear.

She thinks I could win.


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The light shuffling of feet is what wakes me up in the morning, sunlight coming in through the train window too bright for my eyes. I sit up stock straight to see who is here, and the weird yelp tells me that I just scared the Hell out of Hannah. I sigh, putting up my hands in as non threatening way as I can until she calms down and comes over to me. She takes in my appearance for a long moment after sitting beside me, her and I still in last night's clothes as far as I can tell, and patting my head affectionately.

"Morning. Sorry I scared you there. I wasn't sure who was wandering around." I say with a voice filled to the brim with sleep. She shakes her head with a smile, getting up from the satin sheets and moving to the door. Hannah points to it, then to the clock on the wall that last I saw said seven am and now tells me it is nine. I try to use my still on hiatus brain to figure out what she means, but she must see the ultimate struggle because she writes down "breakfast" and a "fifteen" on a scrap paper she had in her pocket. I smile in relief, taking it and reading it over again to be sure.

"Thanks, it's too early for anything to be computing. I fell asleep two hours ago." I tell her and she gives me this scolding look before patting my head again and leaving as quietly as yesterday. I throw myself face first into the soft pillow, wondering if Adam slept at all either. He's probably bright eyed and bushy tailed as fuck, ready for the Parade tonight. I'll be lucky if I make it past my eggs in a few minutes. So with that in mind I let myself stay in that self pity or a moment, then swing my legs over the edge of the bed and walk to the bathroom sullenly.

Yesterday there was a girl with dark circles permanently under her eyes in the mirror, crappy clothes on a thin frame of skin and bones. Now I see a girl with darker circles, her green eyes scared under the bravado of strength. She has nicer clothes on now, but her face is paled and the freckles stand out even more under the brow curtain. I throw some cold water on my face to erase the fear and unsteadiness, stepping back out into the room and changing into another pair of pants that are black denim with a deep navy t-shirt. I force myself to stand a bit straighter, squaring my shoulders and taking to the empty hallway and opening the dining car's door. The greeting makes me want to run back to my quiet room.

"Good morning dear! We were wondering when we would see one of you!" Gwen says happily and I'm surprised that Adam isn't here yet. Mags looks at me approvingly, and Finnick...I'm pretty sure he's looking at me with a different approval and I meet him in a glare. He smirks and Mags hits his head as I take my seat next to her, and unfortunately across from him. His eyes light up to see me there, and when the plate is set down in front of me he watches while making faces I believe are an attempt to make me laugh. I roll my eyes over my eggs, taking in the deep purple marks under his eyes covered by makeup. His hair is mussed too, sticking up like yesterday but much more chaotic now that he decided to wear more tight clothing. Yet his eyes are what get to me, in the sparkling green is an apprehension and a knowing terror. Like he is afraid o something he knows is coming...but what is it?

"Did you sleep well Miss Cresta?" Mags' gravelly voice asks, her hand petting my hair gently. I turn to look at her and shrug. I can't lie by the look of me, but I could stretch the truth enough to not get a lecture about staying up all night. I can see Finnick's eyebrows raise and even if Mags seems to believe me I know my mentor doesn't. I decide that talking might convince him, at least give merit to my case.

" I slept okay, not as well as I would have liked but well enough. Those beds just suck you right in" I say confidently, taking a big bite of pancake to stop the word flow before nerves get to me. I don't want to spill my guts out in front of pretty boy and the puppy, but maybe Mags would understand how much I need answers. I need someone to rely on and Odair as my mentor is not giving me that.

"Well that's wonderful! We need to look our best for the stylists. The train should be coming in about a half-hour from now." Gwen excitedly says and I smile a bit which makes her even happier. Then she is gone, saying something about getting her lazy tribute from his room. Yeah lady, good luck with that. Even his mommy can't get him up without a fight.

"She thinks you're a career you know." Finnick says, finally actually speaking for the first time since last night. I look at him cockily, my chin in the air and a little sneer on my face. Mags chuckles when he eyes get a little wide with my new demeanor.

"She should! A poor kid from a poor family is definitely going to have enough money to become a career. I mean, I just let my brothers and sisters go hungry so I have the killer instinct." I tell him, my voice saturated with sarcasm. He is surprised by my blatant mouthing off, and I see a small smile touch his lips that looks much more genuine than the smirks he keeps throwing my way.

" You be good now girl, don't want to lose any support that comes with being a career." Mags scolds lightly, swatting my shoulder half heartedly and smiling a slightly toothless smile. I grin in the light of her good mood, and so does Finnick while we continue eating. It only takes a minute for someone to talk though, and all I really want is to eat breakfast.

"You know, why don't you tell us about yourself? We need to know about our tributes anyway and it will pass the time." Finnick says, leaning that pretty face of his on his hands and looking at me curiously. Mags nods in agreement and sits back in her chair, my nerves coming back when I realize I'm going to be talking about myself. I'm not a fan of myself, and I'm boring as shit. I gulp and put down the fork I was holding, leaning back and pretending to be calm and cool.

"Uh...well I work down at the docks as a fisherman with my crew under Gregory Wheaton. We go out and get the oysters for the District quota, or I do, to get the pearls and meat. The others sail our ship." I provide and Mags motions her hand for me to continue. I'm not so sure what she wants me to say though, and Finnick jumps in to keep us rolling.

"Well what's the names of your crew mates? I used to work as a dock hand before my Games, I could know them." Finnick asks, leaning toward me more.

" Well our Captain is Mr. Wheaton, and the first mate is Hector Barnes. I'm our diver to go down deep and pick the right oysters. The twins, Ben and Jack Croly, are the navigators and crew who do the nets for fishing. It's a small group, but we all have a very specific skill sets. Although Jack would brag about his being off the ship if you know what I mean. It's a diverse kind of crew I guess, all of us with differing personalities." I say, sad when I realize how much I miss them all. I wish they could be here now, that we could do this as a team like we always do. But they aren't here. They never will be here hopefully...

"I've heard of them," Finnick says thoughtfully, pulling me out of my thoughts, "but my crew was older than them. I worked with my uncle, his son Dylan, a boy named Percy Andrews, Caleb Simmons, Alyssa Simmons, and Matt Haus." He tells me and I recognize the names of a crew we had run into plenty of times on the water. I like them well enough, but they aren't the most personable people on the water. However we have helped each other on multiple occasions with hauls, and they are there every year for our farewell in the bar.

" I know them. Good people with skill that I can appreciate. There have been plenty of times we worked together in the past." I say kindly, and he smiles wide knowing I have heard of his crew. I wonder if he has ever gone back to them in these last five years. If he still returns to his roots. I don't get the chance to ask when Grey bursts through the door.

"How many siblings do you have Annie? Are they all as much a pain as your brother?" Gwen asks in a huff, sitting down in her seat again and looking angry. I chuckle, and Finnick takes the opportunity to continue the interview of me

"Yeah, how about you tell us about your family sugar. They all as pretty as you?" He asks with a devil may care grin. Mags waps him on the head again before I decide I'll answer. I hold up one hand, taking a deep breath o count us off.

"Well there is Amelia who is the oldest and...yeah, and then Adam who looks different from us all and acts just like dad. I'm next, in the middle, and then my little brother Arnav who turned thirteen before the Reaping. Amy is the youngest, but she's only five. I'm pretty sure she's the nicest one of us, and everyone adores her cuteness factor. At the very least she is the most likeable next to Arnav, and the two oldest are the ones you can never get out of bed. It's was an all out war when Amelia was still in school in the mornings. " I laugh, and she laughs too before dropping words that make the room go silent.

"It's too bad we couldn't have your other brother then. It sounds like he would be easier to get ready." She says and I stop talking. She doesn't seem to notice my stunned silence, but Mags does. She holds my shoulder and Finnick even gives me this apologetic gaze before returning to his food. The door slams open right after he picks up the spoon, Adam standing there seething with fury. I feel myself standing before he even makes it half way across the room.

"Adam." Is all I say, his burning eyes off Grey and now resting solely on me. I stand my ground beneath those black eyes, the anger only growing when I never break eye contact.

" What the hell do I have to get up for!? Huh? It's damn ridiculous she can walk into my room and tell me what to do!" He yells at me, pointing at Gwen who looks startled he has followed her. I sigh, used to this kind of behavior, and step towards him calmly.

"You need to calm down Adam. It's just a few more mornings. We aren't at home anymore and you can't act like we are. You want to get yourself killed?" I ask, and he wavers at the last sentence. We stare at each other for a minute before he huffs and takes his place beside a flabbergasted Finnick. I shrug at him when he looks at me, leaving the table to look out the window. As soon as I get there the entire car loses sunlight, the walls of a great structure surrounding the train blocking it out. This must be one of the entrances to the Capitol. I push myself over one of the plush chairs from yesterday, tipping it over to get a better look in my curiosity and haste.

The scene I see is amazing.

The buildings shine as far as I can see, scraping the sky in their grandeur. The train has now slowed to normal speeds and I can see people of all colors waving viciously at me from the streets. I wave back from the adrenaline rush of seeing the different colored houses and Capitolites, Finnick coming to my side to wave as well and flash the ladies his trademark smile. I try to ignore him, not wanting his playboy attitude to interrupt this high feeling and possibly reflect onto me. I go to step away quickly but his arm is around me in an almost iron grip, holding me to him like glue. I look up in time for him to grin snarkily down before the train enters the fantastically huge station and the world explodes with noise.

"Make sure to smile and wave sugar." He purrs in my ear and I hit him on the shoulder before plastering the smile he wants on my face and waving joyously.

"Let's go kids, we have stylists to meet. We even got here a little early!" Gwen yells from the now open door. I walk toward her, and when she steps off I am the first they see. The crowd screams when take the step off, and in a moment of ego boosting glory I raise my arms and spread them wide.

I have never heard anything so loud in my life as they chant my District number.

I follow after Gwen with the multi colored people trying to catch more glimpses of me through the Peacekeepers lining our walk way. I wave at them happily, smiling like Finnick told me to and then entering the huge building before us. When the door closes all noise is down immensely, and it is almost dizzying how quiet it has gotten. I turn around to see Adam looking absolutely sullen and my mentors faces looking like the Cheshire Cat's. Finnick walks up to me and moves a stray hair from my face, looking as proud as ever, but now that pride is directed at me.

"You are brilliant sugar." He whispers, and I don't know if I should just accept it or reprimand him for the nickname. I decide to nod and let him be him, slipping from the embrace only to be caught by Mags. Over her shoulder a strange green woman in fancy clothing is taking Adam away, and I feel guilty that I have gotten all the attention. His stylist is gone now with him, but I want to run after and apologize...for what?

"This is a competition dear, you can't feel bad when you get ahead. There is only one who gets to come out." The old Victor whispers and I sadly look at her before Finnick is pulling me away. He sets me in front of a man in simple clothing, and young by the look of things. He has black jeans, faded in the right places, and an elegantly plain blue t-shirt. Golden eye shadow is the only enhancement to his face, covered by a light beard that goes well with the look scruffy artistic I think he is going for. He smiles softly, softer and less eager than any other Capitolite I've seen. He reaches out his hand, our eyes even in height, and I grasp it with comfort. I decide it is safe to return his smile.

"Hello Miss Cresta, my name is Cinna. I thought I would like to meet my tribute ahead of time before the prep team gets a hold of you." His voice is quiet, and I like that. It reminds me of Mags and Arnav.

"Like what you see?" Finnick asks, still behind me and holding my shoulders. Cinna looks at him with a tinge of annoyance. I'm surprised he's so good at hiding it.

"Yes Mr. Odair, I'll just be taking her now however if you don't mind. We need to get to work." Cinna says politely and he takes my hand and I am pulled from Finnick's grasp and into the hallway opposite from Adam.

The hallway is rather tight, all one color and no decorations. It stands out blatantly really, being so much different from the Capitol things I have seen these last two days. My stylist is quiet while I look about, us walking in step as he guides subtly to...The Remake Center? Yeah that sounds about right. He doesn't push for conversation either, just takes glances at my face and allowing me to enjoy this comfortable silence.

But such comforts do not last forever.

"Oooooh Cinna! Is this our tribute?" A loud female voice asks. I see three odd people, two female and one male standing in a room with a table and a tub, a myriad of other things scattered about the wide space. What is this?

" Your prep team." He whispers and then the woman who spoke, her nails long and like talons and hair melded with feathers, walks towards me in pointy heels. Her hooked nose makes her look like a mutated bird of sorts, but there doesn't seem to be anything threatening about her. Really she reminds me a lot of Grey, and when she reaches us she kisses both my cheeks with unhindered exuberance.

" It' s so nice to meet you! We saw you walk off the train and oh did you make a nice first impression. It's been so long since we had a good female tribute from Four! Jacques hasn't shut up since he saw you at the Reaping. Then Victoria says that you could be a Victor and we have just been so excited to see you!" She squeals and the other two are around me in no time, talking a mile a minute. I just smile and nod, which seems to encourage them and make them extremely happy. Cinna smiles a little before taking his leave from where we came and I am left to the devices of the three strangers.

They undress me quickly, and I try not to feel uncomfortable about that because really they seem to not be leering or anything. They are exactly like Grey, puppies given a new toy that they are excited about. Honestly their strange innocence makes my mind spin in an attempt to figure them out. Can they really be this harmless?

"I get to do her hair ladies, that mane is all mine to style." Jacques says, taking my hair in his hands and running his fingers through it curiously. Victoria takes my face nicely in her young hands, her tinged pink skin not hiding that she must be only be two years older than I. She grins huge with her pixy hair cut, blue eyes alight with happiness. The woman who took me from Cinna comes back closer to us after leaving the room, holding a piece of paper in her hands and scanning over it. Her eyebrows knit together, then she clucks her tongue and the two fall silent.

" Okay, Cinna wants a body wax, a bath, and waved hair. He will lead us in the painting, so this shouldn't take long at all." Her voice rings through the space, and the other two are in motion. I am put on the table, and hopefully this experience of waxing will never happen again. I don't yelp, but damn do I want to because I'm pretty sure by the time I got to this warm bath all body hair is long gone. Really, I will never do this again.

As I bathe they sit around the tub of bubbles and ask me about myself, and so I talk about my family again. They become extremely interested in Arnav and Amy too, and that launches a huge amount of questions. How old are they? Are they smart? Are they fisherman too?

" Are they as beautiful as you? Because if they are that poor boy who came with you lucked out on the looks department." The bird woman I now know as Delano asks. I shrug, not wanting to bad mouth my brother even in the wake of Mags' words. I think she gets the hint because the subject changes as I am guided to a chair.

" Well I hope their hair is at least like yours," Jacques says happily, " It is absolutely gorgeous and the brush moves through it like butter." I laugh which gets their attention as he continues to work.

" Guys we're all friends here, so let me tell you something that might surprise you. This hair has NEVER had a brush move smoothly through it. Any magic that is happening here is because of you." I tell them and the two I can see have tears in their eyes. What did I say?

" She called us her friends! Oh!" Victoria says with a voice full of joy. I blush as Delano joins in with the cooing and Jacques attempts to keep doing my hair through his blubbering. I blush as they tell me how touching that is, patting my arms and face nicely. I smile, unable to believe they are so touched that I consider myself close to them. I mean I just told them my whole story while naked! It reminds me of Hannah, and I begin to wonder what tributes from my District are actually like. Are my own people really that unkind to them? Are other people really that unkind? I don't get the chance to ask when my stylist comes back and they try to turn off the waterworks.

"Is my tribute ready yet?" I hear Cinna's voice ask from the door and I wish I had a towel or something as my face catches on fire.

"She's so wonderful Cinna. You better have an idea that will get our tribute to the top!" Delano scolds lightly and dabbing her tears. He smiles before handing me a robe, taking them in with appreciation. I stand and put it on, my hair hanging down my back in what feels like waves. I wish I could see it, because it feels odd like when I just get out of bed in the morning.

"Yes I'm sure she deserves the best. It's a good thing that's exactly what I have ladies and gentleman. Now let's get this gorgeous girl ready for the parade." He tells them but the whole time he is looking me in the eyes thankfully. I wonder why he has a reason to thank me, because if this is about their tears I don't deserve it. Mr. Wheaton raised me that way...

So then begins the whirlwind of paint and cloth, which is a quite a few hours but feels like minutes in these people's company. I laugh and tell or hear stories while they dress me, bonding with Capitolites that are so different from what the guys and I had imagined on the docks. Perhaps the others were the way we joked, but for now I will enjoy the company of good people with good intentions. Even if the way to Hell is paved with them.

" Oh Annie you need to look in the mirror!" Jacques says in a high pitched voice I find hilarious. Cinna holds up the full length thing, and I see what they have been doing this entire time. They haven't been dressing me...they have been transforming me.

" What do you think?" Cinna asks quietly and my prep team is holding a collective breathe. I stare into this different girl's eyes which are still my color but the rest of her looks like the ocean. A blue fabric covers my body in swirls where the paint is not, everything covered that should be all the way down the faint sand specks that cover the bottom of my feet like shoes. I feel my heart wrench just a little.

"I'm glad you could do something with this mess, because whatever you've done has to be a miracle guys." I say happily, even if I'm in a stupid dress. They whoop, Cinna putting down the mirror and hugging me close while the three others jump around. He takes my hand, leading me to the door and my prep team continues to celebrate without noticing we are gone. Then we are in another hallway like the one I entered from, the yelling only a mumble behind the door.

"Time for you to show them what you're made of." He tells me after we have walked a while, the chariots just visible to our left.

"I'm not sure what I'm made of..." I tell him in a strange moment of vulnerability, my voice awkward. He doesn't take advantage of that, and deep down I think he could be a friend in these final days. I'd like that.

"You are made of stronger stuff than anything I have ever seen. Use that Annie and let them slide off of you because if there is one tribute who can win this damn game, it's going to be you." He hugs me close for a moment, and someone clears their throat from the entryway to the growing noise.

"Looks like you worked your magic Cinna." Finnick says and I look at him as he walks towards us. He looks me up and down which makes me go redder than red and glare. He smirks wickedly, touching my face and getting closer than I would like. Cinna steps between us only a little, and he takes a step back while looking down at him. He gets the message.

"Yes, and I would like to get her on the chariot if you wouldn't mind." He icily tells my mentor and drags me away with Finnick trailing behind.

The golden chariots gleam and other tributes stand around talking to their District partners, getting onto the chariots or just standing next to them in mixtures of confidence and fear. I try to take it all in, from the elegant costumes in pink of District One, the deadly Gladiators of Two, the tall trees in Seven to the terrible costumes from Twelve that leave them in only coal dust. Some take glances at me, so I harden my eyes and look back, the careers from One looking interested in my confident behavior. I try to figure out if that is a good thing when Mags coos over me in front of our chariot and Adam stands in it already.

He is in a similar costume as me, holding a trident in his hand and glowering about unhappily. I don't even say hi. I just get on the chariot without really thinking, Finnick patting my hand gently like that first time I met him. Mags gives me a strong smile, and with a last look at Cinna we sail out into the roar of screaming. There is a moment of panic, but it is over by the time we get to the crowd and I stare into all of their hungry faces. they want one thing really, so I give it to them. I raise my arms like I did in the train station and the dress billows out. I give them what they want.

I plaster on my career smile and make them eat out of the palms of my hands.


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

When the chariot is again safe in the alcove Adam and I disembark, my feet wobbly from standing and he literally almost does a face plant. The dress isn't helping in the walking department either, tangling my legs every few steps. I huff, the other tributes pulling in and getting off their chariots as well. The mentors are there to meet them with stylists, but some seem to have got no shows. No shows like us.

" Where the hell are they?" Adam asks angrily, leaning against the golden cart. I shrug leaning against it as well like I would the boat at home, not really caring how unladylike I look in that moment. The girl tribute from seven looks over as they too wait, nodding appreciatively and motioning to my position. I salute her with a friendly smile, and she returns it before motioning me to join her and her District partner. I go to touch Adam's arm but he is at District 1, flirting with the blonde girl who giggles shamelessly as well as their female mentor. I roll my eyes and go to District seven, and the boy looking curiously as I make my way over.

" How's it going Four?" His deep voice booms, but behind the defensiveness I can see a spark of interest.

"Just doing what I'm told. The name's Annie Cresta." I say, taking on the tone I talk to the guys with. He grins and nods, holding out a giant hand that I take.

"Oliver Fogen. It's good to meet someone who ain't a career round here." He says and the girl, who has me by an inch it seems, laughs before she holds her hand out too. I take it gratefully, and she looks surprised when I grip her hand just as steadily.

"Lena Mason. Thought you looked promising from over there. Guess I was right." She tells me, letting go of my hand and taking in my demeanor. I shrug it off, and this makes them ease a little. Perhaps making nice with these kids wouldn't be so bad. Oliver must be thinking along the same lines.

"So training starts tomorrow, interested in doing some stuff with us?" He asks and there is a happiness in Lena's eyes at the thought.

"Yeah, you know, I like that idea. Sounds better than hanging out with my brother. It's not on my agenda to be his wingman, especially with One and Two." I say and we laugh, observing him from here.

"A regular Casanova?" Lena asks with sarcasm and I like her even more. She gets it.

"If the look on the girl from Two's face is any indication than I'd say the girl from One is just dumb." Oliver tosses out and the both of us quickly agree. The creepy girl in the gladiator costume looks un amused. Though that cannot be said for the other three careers who are laughing and falling for his...charm?

"They must all be stupid because trust me in this, he is the least charming being next to my father on the planet."

"Yeah, I could see that. His face during the parade certainly ain't gonna get that kid sponsors. You ain't allied are you?" Lena asks and Oliver raises his eyebrows in concern.

"No, he made it very clear on the train ride here he wanted nothing to do with me. Can't really say I'm surprised." I say, my voice a tinge sad. Their faces turn to relief at this news, but Lena has this pity in her eyes. Did she hear what I didn't want her to? Does she think I'm weak?

"All the better for you Cresta, any brother who leaves family willingly is weak in their own right. Weakness only drags you down." Oliver growls, glaring at Adam's back. Lena puts a hand on my arm for a second while he's not looking, smiling a bit before retracting the unexpected comfort and putting back on the neutral look I've seen a lot in this conversation.

"I think you're right there Fogen. He's not worth her time." Lena tells him hotly, the tone of her voice conflicting with the softer look in her eyes. She is a strange one, that is for sure. Oliver grunts in response and takes a seat, and so does Lena. She pats a seat between them and I take it without hesitation. It is a companionable feeling then, the tension melting from all three of us.

"So what is it like in District Seven anyway?" I ask at last, and both brighten at the interest I show in them. Oliver starts first by telling me about his three younger brothers who work with him in the woods. They are lumberjacks, the men who cut down trees for Panem.

"Nothing is more satisfying then when that tree crashes to the ground. It shakes the whole earth and you feel like you could make this world tremble with your bare hands." He says with passion I can relate too.

"It's like how I feel about the ocean. When the waves crash against the shore. You swim in them and you've never felt so damn free in your entire life. It's like you can control everything about your fate in those minutes you swim." I describe and he nods.

"I like being in the trees, with the wind in my hair and the birds chirping in the air by my face. It almost makes me feel like I could fly away with them."Lena provides and I can't help but feel we bond in the freedom department.

Oliver is only quiet for a few moments before he starts talking again, and this time Lena eagerly joins in on the sharing. They tell me about their families, their houses in the thick woods, and about the thick woods themselves. In return I tell them about my family, my job, and the wide wide ocean that goes on to the horizon. Time flies by as we talk, the other tributes dwindling until we and the career pack minus District 1 are the only ones left. They watch us laugh and joke, the boy from Two looking as if he wants to join in on our fun. Adam looks envious that I, too, have made...friends. Because so quickly, like with my prep team and my stylist and Hannah, I have found people I want to call my friends.

It feels so nice to be accepted here, even if only for a little while.

"Sorry about the wait there guys. We had a problem getting down here." Finnick says, striding towards us with Mags, Cinna, the green woman and who I assume to be the District Seven people on his heels. He winks at me, calling for Adam as a monster takes the tributes from Two away. Mags pats my head affectionately, looking wonderingly at my new companions. Their mentors look surprised as well by our closeness, and the female Mentor steps towards Lena, the resemblance in them scarily striking. Except this one looks much more terrifying than Lena.

"Well, who's your friend sis?" She asks Lena, and I was right in the resemblance. But that would mean this young woman is...

"Johanna meet Annie Cresta, Annie this is my big sister Jo." Lena says happily and I stand and offer my hand. Johanna Mason looks taken aback by my offer, and even more so when I don't back down from her scowl and iron grip. When she lets go I see I have already gained something of her respect, which is good because I want to actually run screaming from the most awesome Victor next to Mags of all time. When she won four years ago at sixteen I fan-girled over her for months, and had always thought meeting her would be the best thing since...I don't know holy sweet baby anything I'm excited.

"Good to meet you Miss Mason." I say respectfully. She smirks, rolling her eyes and punching my shoulder lightly. Lena looks delighted, so it must be a good thing.

"Call me Johanna, Miss Mason is way to proper kid." She tells me, smiling like Lena does. I return it, punching her shoulder without thinking. She looks amazed I would even dare, but she reminds me of the guys so honestly it felt natural. She turns to the huge male Mentor behind her, who is watching us curiously and amused.

"I like this one Blight. Talk to Odair and Mags about her. Alright with you two?", She shoots at her tributes and they nod enthusiastically," Okay then. What about you kid, allies with my tributes?". She just asked me that, and I look at Mags for an answer. She gives me a subtle nod.

" It would be my genuine pleasure." I tell her, and she smirks before taking with her the rest of District Seven. I watch them go, utterly flabbergasted I managed to get in with someone. Honestly since my friends are so obnoxious I figured making normal ones would be difficult.

"It's a good job you did girl. Getting in with an outer District is best for you anyway." Mags tells me, giving me an approving glance like I planned. I smile hesitantly at her, and look at Finnick who hasn't said a word for the entire transaction. He is actually nowhere near us, flirting openly and shamelessly with a girl my age who's pink skin makes me want to vomit. He pulls her into him, and the way she moves makes me blush and look away. It is obvious what they are planning, and I'm not sure I want to see it. Mags scowls a little in his direction, and Adam is openly gaping at the fact Finnick is letting his thoughts be known to the young girl. Without a word to any of us he takes her away, out back onto the street where the Capitolites are partying.

"Well fuck him too then. Some mentor you got there sis, a womanizer who can't keep it in his pants long enough to do his fucking job." Adam spits in his direction, stalking off to the door with his stylist trailing behind. I glare balefully in Finnick's direction and for a second he turns around and our eyes meet. I put all my anger into the stare before going over to help Mags up and walk after my brother.

"Where are you going Annie?" I hear Cinna ask from behind me, and I choose not to answer. Instead I step on the elevator and wait, my brother's mentor and my stylist standing next to me while the glass doors slide shut. There is no talking while Mags pushes the button with a four on it, sliding up the huge building like a rocket. In moments we have stopped and I can see the grandeur we would be staying in for the next few days.

"This is our floor. Didn't Gwen tell you it would be impressive." Mags asks quietly and I take in the giant space.

The living area with television, sectional, and chairs sit by the window that doubles as a wall and I can see the sun setting over the skyscrapers. On the other side of the room is a dining table set with ten high back chairs made of cherry. It gleams in the light, the kitchen barely visible from my viewpoint. It is all painted the faintest blue, the furniture matching with the walls in different hues. It is really something to behold for a kid like me.

"I've never imagined anything like this." I say in slight awe. Mags smiles and Cinna laughs, Adam coming from a hallway to the right looking dazed.

"Annie you have to see these rooms. They have everything you could want. The escort was just showing me the ropes." He tells me, taking a seat on the seaweed green sectional. I'm so tired right now that I could sleep on the dock, I don't really care if it's amazing as hell.

"Well we can show you everything tomorrow. Right now we need to get you two showered and then off to bed. You have training in the morning." Mags orders and she bids a good bye to Cinna before grabbing Adam and leaving me behind.

" So...do you know where I'm supposed to be going?" I ask him, feeling lost and abandoned. He shakes his head.

"No I don't. I got off just to tell you goodnight before I went to where the stylists say."He tells me, giving me a quick hug.

"Well goodnight to you too. I'll uh...see you tomorrow?"

"Of course, as soon as you are back from training I'll come to see you."

Then he is gone, the elevator zooming him up and away from me. I am alone in the silence, one mentor assisting her tribute, and mine off doing...someone. I take a deep breath and walk down the hall alone, looking at the doors until I see one that says Tribute Girl. Across the hall is a mentor room, but I ignore it and step into my space. It has a whole wall made of glass, but otherwise the set up is the same as the train's room. Even down to the color scheme.

"At least there isn't anything else to get used to just yet." I whisper to myself, shutting the door and taking to the bathroom. I strip from my dress, trying not to damage it at all and turning on the water in the shower as hot as it goes. As I step in the paint melts off of me, and I choose the honey shampoo with seaweed soap. The shower does the same thing it did on the train, spraying me and rinsing me in sync until I'm clean. I don't step out though, instead standing under the hot spray until it feels cold.

This time I side step the dryer, grabbing the fluffy towel and wrapping it around me. The pajamas I salvage are a pair of cotton blue shorts, a green fitted tanks to go with them. I shove the outfit on, throwing myself under the plush sheets and listening hard to Mags speak to Adam down the hall. I fall asleep wishing there was someone to tell me goodnight...

When I wake up in the morning the dawn is only thinking about kissing the sky. I check the clock and see it is only six- thirty but I don't really want to go back to sleep. I swing my legs off the bed with a huff, picking through the closet until I'm in possession of some long shorts and a baggy t-shirt. I walk with it to the bathroom, brushing my teeth and putting the clothes on. I toss the pajamas on the bed after I make it, leaving quietly so I don't wake anyone up.

The main space is void of people when I get there, the lights dimmed but on enough I can see. I take a seat on the sectional so that I can see the window perfectly, watching as the sunrise progresses slowly and beautifully. It is so different over these buildings, and it makes my heart ache when I think of the first rays touching the ocean. This experience isn't anything to be compared to home.

"Ugh man, I'm fucking starving." I hear Finnick say from behind me, stepping off the elevator heavily. A girly giggle tells me he isn't alone and I duck into the couch and pray they don't see me. I really don't want them to see me.

"Yeah, all that work I think you would be." His companion gushes and I want to vomit because I'm guessing I know what they are talking about.

"I should probably tell you to go babe. I've got a tribute to send off." He tells her, voice thick and slurred. She gives a little whine, but the elevator closes and there is no more girly voice. There is only Finnick walking over to the sectional and starting when he sees me staring at him. There is a lot to stare at though because the shirt he had is gone and his tight pants are wrinkled suspiciously. We stare at each other in silence for a long time, me judging him and he watching my reactions.

"So uh, sorry for last night. Um..." He tries but I leave him hanging. I don't feel like accepting a weak ass apology for a weak ass excuse because he was a jerk. He looks upset that I don't respond, awkwardly shuffling his feet and looking at me hopefully.

"What time am I supposed to be at training?" I ask instead, and his eyes tell me I hurt him.

"You start at eight, so you should probably get some breakfast to eat." He orders me, eyes hardening. I glare at him because he has no right to be this way, so I choose to be bold while looking him in the eye and standing up.

"Yeah? And maybe you shouldn't be telling me what to do. I've gotten this far without your words of wisdom pretty boy, and you just walking in after a night out is not the way to make me listen to you." I tell him angrily. He looks genuinely surprised that I said it, his eyes wide and mouth hanging open. I turn my back on him, walking towards my room in a huff. Unfortunately I run headlong into Mags.

"Oh man I'm so sorry. I wasn't looking where I was going." I stutter and she brushes it off, patting my head. Then she turns her attention to Finnick who looks as if he's cringing under her gaze.

"I can understand two in the morning boy, but seven in the morning is **not** in the job description. Now let's get this girl some breakfast." She sternly tells him and I wonder why she lets him go out at all. He looks guilty as hell though and it is all so worth it to watch him squirm. Mags takes my hand nicely, leading me to the table and setting me down. She then goes to fetch Finnick and shoves him across from me before shuffling into the kitchen where I see Hannah at the stove. I wave before looking at my "mentor".

"Where'd she go?" I ask coldly, not in the mood to talk to him anymore but not awkward enough to ignore the three feet of distance.

"Probably to help with breakfast sugar, or are you not listening to her too?" He sneers.

"I'd sooner listen to Adam before I listen to you. Unless you change your tune I've got no time for a jerk who would just write me off when a pretty girl is involved. Sorry if that hurts your feelings but I don't want to die." I shoot back and his face falls into one of saddened realization. Does he see? Or is it a lost moment of insight? Mags hustles herself in before anymore words can be exchanged.

"Here are some eggs, eat up while I get your brother ready. It's nice to have one tribute who can get up and dressed alone." Mags tells me affectionately. She puts some toast and ginger ale in front of Finnick without a word, then taking her leave once more. I start to devour my food, the over easy eggs bursting in my mouth. I savor the taste, not used to this quality food and knowing it won't last forever. Finnick just picks at his toast and stares at the table. I still don't feel bad...I don't have time for that.

When my brother and I get out of the elevator the career pack is waiting for him. He goes over without saying a word to me, and I stand alone for ten minutes before Lena and Oliver get here. When they do I wave a bit to get their attention, Lena dragging Oliver over to me and both of them smiling wide.

"Did you see the rooms in this place? They make my sister's cabin look weak!" Lena tells me, and Oliver just shrugs.

" It's not so awesome really. I prefer the log walls back home than these smooth things here." He says.

"I'm not all that in love with mine either. Honestly everything is impressive and all but I want a different color scheme. I'm tired of the blue and green thing." I grumble and in the end the other two concede to my point.

A peacekeeper tells us when it's time to be quiet, a woman coming onto a platform to tell the recently gathered tributes a huge amount of statistics. The only thing I gain from it; survival is extremely important. One look at the career pack tells me they don't take it into consideration. They actually make some unholy noise on the way to the weapons.

"So anywhere but there?" Oliver asks sarcastically and Lena nods. I follow them over to all the survival stations, our group stopping first at the knot tying. I try to ignore the girl from Eight and small boy from Five who seem to be following us. It doesn't work and as we joke I can see the others watching them closely too. It unnerves us to think we are already being followed and he Arena is four days away.

However by the time lunch rolls around we have hit and mastered every station in survival by working as a team. It leaves us with a sense of pride that we could do this, that we might actually be able to do this, so we pile our plates high with sweets and food of all kinds in celebration.

" We are fucking awesome guys." Lena laughs after we claim a table in the corner. The career pack is on the other side of the cafeteria with the other tributes scattered between us in groups or alone. I'm glad they are so far from us, because Adam looks like he's being obnoxious.

"We are man, we could be as good as the career pack if we wanted." Oliver says.

"All we need is to practice with some weapons." I murmur, and they both look surprised I would suggest it.

"You think we can get anywhere near them? They have a monopoly." Lena asks and I smirk.

"I'm fantastic with a trident, and I want to get to know these before I get one in the arena. What about you? Miss the feeling of the axes you told me about yesterday?" This gets smirks of agreement from both of them.

"You know what, I think we should. Lets so it at the start of tomorrow." Lena decides and we put our hands in the middle...

"Do you mind if we join you?" A girl's voice asks, and we turn to see our stalkers from earlier standing there. She is tall and slender, but not very close to Lena and I's height, with long red hair that makes her stand out. The boy is very tiny, his pale face nervous and blue eyes threatening tears under a mop of black hair. I look at the others who shrug.

"Uh, yeah sure I guess. What's your names?" I ask and the girl sits beside Oliver cautiously while the boy clings to her side, right across from me.

"I'm Carrie, from District eight. This is Winston. He's from District Five. " The girl introduces herself and the boy looks up shyly with a nod.

"Cool. Uh, I'm Oliver, the ugly one is Lena, and the uglier one is Annie." Lena gives him the finger before offering her hand. Carrie chuckles, taking it and taking mine in turn. I smile at her, and then offer my hand to Winston. Slowly but surely he takes it in his clammy one. Carrie relaxes after that, and I learn about the textile District that provides all the clothes in Panem. We tell her about ourselves too and it turns out her and I both have five kids in the family. She's the oldest though, like Oliver...who begins flirting unabashed.

"Nice, because that's not awkward at all." Lena whispers in my ear while trying to hold in her laughter. I grin, and she punches my shoulder when I let a stifled chuckle through. I punch her back and the other three stare at us while we hit and laugh like morons.

"You two are fucking weird, now finish your food before we have to go back." Oliver tells us half-heartedly. I do as I'm told, Lena nudging me every once in a while and I back until we finish out the day by doing the huge obstacle course with our new found companions.

"So tomorrow we get here early and beat them to the weapons."Lena says as the five of us pile into the elevator. Winston looks terrified by this idea, but Carrie is confident and excited that we won't be part of their system. I pat his head to try and make him feel better, and he looks at me aghast when the elevator stops on my floor.

"Check you guys later, bright and early at 7:45." I tell them and Lena gets in one more punch as everyone tells me goodbye. They are gone before I can do anything else and I pout a second, then heading for the kitchen. There is no one in sight like I found in the living room, so Adam must be in his room since he left before us. I don't exactly care, I grab a glass of water from the insane cabinets and head for the sectional.

I take my spot that looks out the window, dreaming of what this sight would look like from the roof or just the District Twelve floor. They would see everything...but could I get up there? I get lost in planning a way up, so lost in fact I never hear Mags coming over and sitting on the other side of the couch with Grey and talking about dinner.

"Oh my gosh Annie! I didn't even see her there Mags the little thing is so quiet!" Gwen yells and I start. Mags chuckles at my expression, but I don't acknowledge it. She points at the table laden with food, their plates cleaned. I stand without a word as Grey keeps on talking, taking some fruit and a bowl of soup to the couch. Cinna and Adam join us later and I listen to my brother gush about the careers. Mags shares tips with him on how to survive and I simply listen, talking to my **stylist **about what he thinks of my alliance.

By twelve-thirty everyone is off to their quarters, Cinna hugging me again at the elevator as Mags takes my brother off. I go to my room alone once more for the second night, armed only with the knowledge I gained from overhearing conversations tonight and the questions I randomly got in. I get in the shower and put the pajamas back on, the clock telling me we had separated only a half hour ago. I can't think of sleeping so I head to Mags' room hoping I can get some advice from a mentor but she is asleep because I can hear the light snoring. There is nothing...no one in the living area when I check, nor is there anyone in the kitchen. I go back to my room alone, Finnick not here at all.

I just wish Lena and Oliver could be here with me.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

I awake from a light sleep at best to see the sky lightening and the stars hiding in the sun's soft rays. It seems I'm going to be making a habit of waking up at six-thirty instead of the average five am., which I really won't complain about because it may help my friends in the arena either way. Still...I do like sleeping sometimes. Arnav is probably still asleep beside Amy in our tiny little bedroom, dreaming happy dreams... I wonder if their thoughts were happy when they saw me in the tribute parade two days ago. I wonder what the guys thought of me waving, or me in a dress and smiling like crazy. I sigh.

There isn't any time to think about that.

I roll out of bed, heading straight to the closet for another pair of shorts and simple t-shirt like I chose yesterday. I take them with me into the bathroom, undressing from my warm bed clothes and putting on the chilled outfit. I shiver, brushing my teeth and securing my hair back at the sink. It's a little dirty when I leave it behind, so I scrawl a note for Hannah to apologize before leaving my bedroom and heading for the kitchens.

Everywhere is still deserted, no sign of my mentors, my brother, or the Capitolites and Hannah. Perhaps that's for the best, seeing as I'm not sure we are allowed to be down there so early. I don't really care, but I also don't want to get lectured this early before I can think straight. I'm not one to accept in depth questioning while I'm not cognitively able to respond.

"So you're always up this early then girl." Mags says from the fancy stove, heating a teapot. I shrug, covering up rather poorly my startled expression and taking a glass from the cupboard beofre rummaging through the refrigerator.

"I usually get up earlier than this for work at home, so really I'm sleeping in." I respond, setting the four eggs I found onto the counter and pouring my orange juice. She takes in my dressed and ready figure before speaking again.

"And how long have you been working girl? Does your brother work at all?" She asks with a raised eyebrow. I stifle a grin.

"Be honest, do you think he ever would? I'm sure he hasn't worked a day in his life. That's just the way of things in my house." I tell her and I see it sinking in. Is he not the golden boy you thought he was?

"Do any of your other siblings work? Your parents?"

"My mom does errands sometimes for people in the District. Amelia isn't...no one will hire her. My father is a worse version of Adam, and Arnav tries to when he can. He works with me at the docks on Saturdays if I'm not out collecting the pearls for the quota. Amy is much too young to be worrying about that. Haven't I told you all this before?" I throw at her and she is silent again, mulling over what to ask next.

" Only a little, not enough for me to understand you. How long have you been carrying your family on your shoulders girl?" She inquires and I stop buttering the pan I finally found.

"What do you mean?" I ask quietly, taken off guard by such a personal question.

"How long have you struggled to help them? How long have you carried them through life girl?" She is next to me now, face to face against the counter. I stare into her eyes as she does mine, and I feel as if she is pulling every secret I have ever had from my soul with her gaze. Shamefully, I look away.

"I got my job when I was young. Too young to be working at the docks. But it was what I had to do, like taking the tesserae every year. Amelia and Adam never would so it was up to me. Is that what you wanted to know?" I bite, on the defensive because she is getting way too personal. She looks saddened by my reaction, putting a weathered hand on my shoulder.

"What made you save me that day?" She whispers, and I'm extremely confused.

"What are you talking about? I saved you because that's the right thing to do." She looks thoughtful at my answer.

"Who taught you that? It wasn't your father was it girl? Annie, how did you become who you are?" She asks, and I am angry she assumes someone made me.

"No one made me, I made myself. I got along on my own and apparently that's how it's going to be in these Games too!" I shout, throwing the eggs in the heated pan. She says nothing for a long time and I don't look at her; I just fry my eggs and wonder why she wants to know about me. Why does she care when I'm not her tribute?

"I'm sorry I upset you. It's just you are so hard to understand girl and to help you I need to know things." She says from her place next to me at the stove.

"You have a tribute and I can take care of myself. I have an alliance...I know how to fight with trident, and I know how to survive. Just take care of him because he needs all the help he can get. I don't want to be a burden to you." I say, taking the eggs from the pan and putting them onto the simple blue plate I scavenged for.

"It's my job to take care of my tributes, both of them." She speaks so quietly that I'm not sure I heard her. I don't ask, only shoving the eggs in my mouth and leaving the kitchen as fast as I can. I feel exposed to the old woman and I don't know what to think about it. I want her to know me because she makes me feel safer than I have in a long time... but I need time to think!

The elevator takes me down in a rush, the clock inside telling me I'm a little early. I don't care if I'm alone, I get off the elevator anyway to see the lonely expanse that is the training center. There is only dead ringing silence to greet me, so I take a seat against the wall and mull over what Mags was asking me. I mean, I help people who need me and I always will. Like how I'll always help my family...It's who I am. That's all there is to it. But what does that have to do with the Games? I feel like I'm missing something extremely important.

"Hi Annie." I hear a small voice say from the elevator. Standing before me is Winston, hands shoved in huge pockets on his oversized shorts. He looks scared again, his roundish glasses lopsided and falling off his face. I pity the poor kid much more than I know I should.

"Hey Winston, how are you doing? You wanna sit?" I ask and he comes to me and slumps down the wall. He then pulls his knees under his chin, sighing before giving me a small smile.

"Thanks... I thought we were supposed to be here at 7:45. How come you got here so early?" He raises his eyebrows, pulling his legs tighter to himself. He looks almost suspicious by my behavior too, which raises the hairs on my neck in a bad way.

"I needed time to think. My mentor and I had a heart to heart and I guess I sort of lost my shit you know? I needed my space." I say with a sigh and he nods his head, the look gone as soon as it came. I still don't let down all my guard though.

"I needed some space too, Lizzy was scaring me again and I wanted to get away from her. I don't think she likes me all that much." He tells me, the sadness palpable and coming off of him in waves. I look away from him, hoping the lost puppy look won't get to me too bad. But any tension I was trying to keep up was leaving me rapidly and I spoke before I really had decided what I wanted to say.

"Who cares Winston, she shouldn't be getting in your way. In a few days you won't have to see her again anyway. For now just ignore her because otherwise you'll psych yourself out before you ever get to the arena." I give him the only wisdom I have and he smiles just a tiny bit. Maybe I should talk out of my ass more often...seemed to work like it does for Jack at any rate.

"I suppose you're right Annie. I'm not sure how helpful I'll be to you guys though." He sounds absolutely crushed again.

"We'll all teach you a little something so you can defend yourself if you want me to. Don't worry about it for now because once we get in the arena who knows what plans will change. All I know is we will figure this out together." I say nicely patting his head as the elevator slides open. Lena and Oliver slide out dressed and ready like me, Carrie following closely behind and excited.

"Well bitches, are you ready to show them what we got?" Lena asks, sitting next to me and hitting my arm lightly. I hit her back, getting a glare that means the war is back on.

"Should we really be calling each other bitches and such?" Carrie puts in, sitting on Winston's other side. Lena snorts and I roll my eyes. You aren't friends if you can't throw insults and understand they don't mean it.

"If you're really friends with someone then you can call them a bitch. Friends insult the Hell out of each other because they can. They keep each other down to earth" She tells her and Oliver whoops in agreement before taking his seat. Carrie grins only a little, but Winston has a smile on from ear to ear.

"Either way, I want to kill some dummies. My hands have been itching for an axe since I saw those things yesterday." Oliver says, his fist in the air.

"Yeah, I want to destroy some things so I have a skill to show the Gamemakers." I agree, and they seem to all agree with me on this point.

"Watch us get kickass scores, we could be the second career pack." Carrie jokes but there is something there, something I've never thought of before. What if we sold ourselves as such? Sponsors would go insane!

"Guys, that's what we should call ourselves! Like in the interviews and stuff, so the country might lean to our side too." I offer and they mull it over for a moment.

"That doesn't sound so bad, being a career pack. We'll give the Capitol something to look at, give them the show they want." Lena says and Oliver nods his head. Carrie looks like she wants to get in on this as well and Winston is nodding slowly.

"So is it agreed? Are we the second career pack?" Oliver asks and I stand up, followed by Lena.

"I'm going to say we are. What do you all say? An alliance to defeat the original pack? Give them something to be afraid of?" I ask and put my hand out. Lena puts her own on top of mine, Oliver close behind. Winston and Carrie stand slower and put their hands in as well and we stand in unity for a second before our hands drop to our sides.

We don't talk about what would happen if we were the only ones left, it is never mentioned. We only think about the beginning, where we change history by creating another pack of skilled tributes. We only talk about how the five of us can change the Game. We only talk about the glory of winning against the arrogance of District 1 and 2. We only talk about the things we can bring ourselves to discuss...because the other events are terrifying.

The rest of the tributes gather quickly after our plan is set in motion, and they all stare at how close we are, the careers staring like they are debating if we are one big alliance or not. I smirk at Adam who glares deeply at me, unhappy because I now have a leg up in this competition again. But he forgets he has the biggest advantage of all. He has a mentor who's going to get him sponsors in the Arena, so I should find a way to get my own too.

I ignore the nagging in my mind about the conversation this morning as the woman who spoke yesterday gives us the same speech. I don't need the distraction now, I need to get to the weapons when the door we are next to opens wide. I need to erase the unease of whirling thoughts about losing these people to get out. I need to just pick up some weapons and learn like I did yesterday...master some new things and strengthen others.

"Ready?" Lena whispers, and I nod subtly as the glass slides open. We walk in a line through the doors, heads high and confident when we hit the stations. I head for the trident, the feel of it comforting because it reminds me of my home. It reminds me of the fish I catch for dinner, and I pick it up like it is an extension of my very being. It flies from me in a gracefully deadly line of speed, hitting the dummy so hard that the thing falls to the floor with the head rolling away.

It hurts like hell to know it was a fake human being, and it might be a real one soon.

"Damn." I hear a voice say and the girl from Two is near me, staring at the dummy wide eyed. I can see in her there however she really isn't that startled, but I play to her lie. Sometimes when you want to survive you have to play dumb because after all, it catches your enemy off balance.

"Yeah? I've been doing this kind of thing for forever...but I'd much rather the knives. That's what I'm getting when I get to the cornucopia. Then the game can really start." I lie to her and I see she buys into me wanting the knives. All the better she believes my bluff because while she takes the knives I'll have taken her down with the trident. And tomorrow with the Gamemakers I'll make sure one is there waiting for me.

"Oh cool, that's my thing too. Hope you're fast enough to get there before me." She smirks, taking off for the rest of the careers as they watch Lena and Oliver wield huge axes like it's nothing. I see Carrie going to town with a bow and arrow, and it turns out she's pretty good with it too. How she learned it in Eight I'm not entirely sure but you don't look a gift horse in the mouth.

Winston is watching closely, practicing the technique next to her as she shoots. I smile and look about, only the girl from Two seems to be unimpressed by us. I grin satisfied, picking up another trident and spearing my fake opponent through the heart with deadly precision. I ignore how much pain I feel destroying something I always had trusted.

By the time lunch rolls around I'm on a high from tossing that trident, and even more excited after I took a crash course with a sword and found myself even better at it. Lena and Oliver are chattering like little kids about the axes while they devour the food on their plates, Carrie shoving an apple in and sometimes adding to the conversation. I sit and listen for a while, keeping an eye on Winston who looks rather pleased he got a pass from the trainer for his bow skills.

"So which weapon are you going to choose? You were looking bad as hell with that sword Cresta. It would be crazy to give it up for a three pronged spear." Carrie asks across from me, and I shrug.

"I'll probably go in to the Gamemakers and show both of them. But I'm not going to bank on the trident if I can get a sword. There's always those things in the cornucopia." I respond, and Lena looks like she prefers that answer. She must have been worried on me taking chances I didn't need to be taking.

"Good, because now we all can have a reason to run straight into the bloodbath and hope we come out alive." Lena says with a cheeky grin, and Oliver laughs happily while Winston looks uncertain.

"About that, are we all running in? What's the plan for the bloodbath?" Carrie curiously asks. We never thought about that, and I look at Winston for a second before I make a decision.

"How heavy would a bow be if I had to pick it up?" She looks surprised by this question.

"I'd say the arrows and bow would be around four pounds together. Nothing much if they are the same as they are here. I would have to assume they are too." She answers and I nod.

"Then Oliver, Lena, and I will run for the weapons. You and Winston can grab us packs. Together we'll run away and try to make an establishment. Hopefully the careers won't follow us right away. If they do though we'll be together with something to defend ourselves with." I tell them and I can see Lena and Oliver like the plan. Carrie looks unsure however, and Winston looks like he wants to vomit.

"What's wrong Eight? Not liking the idea?" Lena asks, leaning back into her chair. She too notices the trepidation, and in this Game that could mean our deaths. Her eyes are narrowed on the red head, watching every move like she did mine when we first met. I don't blame her, because I too have been watching this girl closely as well. Carrie seems to want to hide under our stares, her discomfort clear in her eyes.

"I don't want to have you sacrificing yourselves for my weapon. What if that's the reason you don't make it out? I don't want to have to live with that for however long I survive in that damn place." She says and Lena loses any hostile tension quickly. She was worried about us.

"Don't worry about Lena, Oliver, and I. We'll be better off I think if there are two sets of hands picking up our survival supplies. Plus the less who go to the bloodbath, the more who make it past day one." I tell her and she drops the argument. The whole table goes silent after that as we think about our futures. In the end I think we all have some trepidation in our eyes.

When I step off the elevator after training alone I feel confident that we will all make it through the bloodbath. It is completely planned out for us to the last moment, but the only thing that keeps me from jumping up and down is the thought of what will happen after. Because after the careers are gone, and after the other tributes have fallen then it will be us...

"Not a good day at training girl?" I hear Mags ask from the couch and I look up to see her staring at me.

"Uh no-no it went fine. Can I apologize for this morning? It's just that it was...you caught me off guard. I wasn't expecting those kinds of questions and it makes me sort of uncomfortable when I'm already not thinking straight." I stutter, and she pats the spot next to her in response. I do as she tells me and take my seat, the old woman touching my cheek lightly before lowering her hand.

"I remember when I was reaped for my games," she tells me softly out of the blue and I perk my ears to listen out of curiosity, " I was eighteen when they called my name. I was a worker at the docks just like you actually, but my father owned the boat I worked on. All my brothers and sisters worked beside me as well, but I was the oldest so I worked the most hours. I was our biggest provider after my father got hurt when I was sixteen, so I can relate to you helping your family but I was in a more stable environment. When my name was called all I could think about was coming home to them. All I could think about was making a better life for them. I felt so lost too, on the train and parade, like there was no chance I would ever make it. I felt all alone. But when I got here I found allies like you girl, and I was on my way to being a Victor. But it all changes when you get into the arena...because...there is only one person who can come out. Have you thought about that girl?" She asks and I stare at her, my eyes stinging shamefully.

"I-I...I mean of course I've thought about it. They're my friends. I just...I don't know what to think about it. It's stupid for me to be so scared too, and the thought makes me want to cry. That isn't something I do, but it keeps stinging and I'm not sure what I want to think anymore. I'm lost and I hate it" I pour my heart out to her and she nods her head slowly, taking me in.

" Girl, why are you always trying to be so strong?" She whispers.

" Because if I'm weak, I know there will be no one to catch me when I fall. But if I'm strong then I won't have to worry about that. Why are you asking me these questions? Why are you telling me all of these things? Why? Because I have no mentor and you feel sorry he hasn't shown up since yesterday? Why do you feel the need Mags?" I ask, standing up. She touches my hand gently, effectively calming me down and easing me back into a sitting position. I need answers.

"I see something in you that I haven't seen in a long time girl. I see something great that can't be held back by anything. I see the strongest tribute I've ever had the fortune to mentor." She says to me, and I don't have anything to say. I only sit there for what seems like an eternity as she waits for me to take it all in. Oh so patiently she waits and finally I say the only thing that comes to my mind.

"Is there any way to get up onto the roof?" I get out and she smiles a little as if she was expecting this answer almost.

"Hit the top button on the elevator numbers, the one that reads thirteen. It'll take you where you want to go and you don't need to worry about being overheard by them or I." She instructs but that is not what I want.

"I want you to come with me though. I just need some fresh air, but there are things I need to talk to you about and I'd like to not do it where we can be...uh... interrupted."I say awkwardly, but she seems to know what I mean. I don't trust Adam to keep his mouth shut if he hears about our plans at the cornucopia. But I need someone to know what we are planning. If this old victor really does believe in me the way she says she does then I need some answers before I run headlong into a fight to the death.

She simply nods and we move together to the elevator, the little button shining as her weathered hand pushes it in. We go spiraling upwards until cool air hits my face, knocking the breath from me in the best way. I step out and breathe it in while Mags follows me, taking in the sight of the blazing sunset from the roof top. After a moment she taps my shoulder in question and I look down.

"Well girl? Say what you want to say while you have the chance to say it." She orders kindly and I open up with everything I have been thinking about. I tell her about Lena, Oliver, Winston, and Carrie. I tell her about our plans, and I tell her about my fears for once we achieve our goals in the arena. I tell her all I have.

" I recall a similar problem, with a boy from twelve and a girl from three. I wanted to win and return to my family but...they were so very special to me, these two people. I stopped thinking about how they would need to die... for me to return to my brothers and sisters. It wasn't until it was us three and the boy from two that I realized just what had to happen. So in the night I made a decision to leave them to their own devices and see who won. But there was nothing that could prepare me for what happened after that. She went quickly when the boy from two found her, though I think he tried to make it slow. My other friend did not go so gracefully, his broken neck not enough to kill him fast. I killed him myself with a knife I had taken from camp, and the trident flew straight through the other boy's head." She tells me, but I'm not sure I understand what I'm supposed to get from this. All I feel is a pit wide in my stomach.

"What is the moral? What am I supposed to be learning? Is this supposed to help me?" She smiles sadly at my answer.

"You have choices to make Annie Cresta, and either you'll be dead or haunted in the end. Can you make it out instead of them? Can you say goodbye or will you stay until it is only you and you have watched them fall?" Mags throws at me and I falter for the first time in a long while.

"I..." but there is nothing to say, because what will I do?

"I'm a mentor dear and I have asked a lot of you today, but you needed to understand who you are, what you will be going back to, and what you will have to do to come out alive. That's what I want you to see. There is no moral, there is only choices. Because saying morals can survive in this place is a terrible mistake in judgment." She says and then I am alone on the roof, wind blowing and mind racing.

The tears still sting behind my eyes, but I never let one fall.


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

I went back downstairs so late that when I threw myself on the bed the lights in the common area were off and there were no bodies to be bothered by my presence. Not much later my eyes open exactly at 6:30 again too, even if I had gone to sleep a mere three hours ago. Either way it was a restless sleep, because I think I know I'll stay with them...but there is a piece of me that I wish was never born because she wants to leave them behind. I hug my legs close and grip tight as my mind assaults me with horror and guilt again, like it has since Mags left me on the roof.

A rustle catches my attention and I wrench my eyes open to see that middle aged face that makes the tension start to melt away. Hannah stares back, her eyes sad as she looks at me. Without my consent she sits beside me and strokes my hair from my face gently, like I imagine a mother would do for their child when they are upset. I let her, wanting to feel comfort before returning to the training center and performing without any guidance for the Gamemakers. I can't hold back anymore though, the comfort releasing a flood of emotions.

"I'm so fucking scared Hannah. I'm confused, and scared, and nervous. I can't think straight all the way, I worry about Lena...the rest of them. What am I supposed to do without a mentor? Where is he anyway?" I start to pour out but she sets a slender finger over my mouth to make me stop. I do, and she points to a t-shirt and shorts waiting for me on my bed. She then motions towards the shower in the bathroom and I understand. It hurts though that she won't hear me out, because even after talking to Mags yesterday I feel lonelier than ever. But I will not let her know that.

Without a word I get up and take the clothes with me, shutting the door and stripping down. I pick the same soap and shampoo as all those other times, letting it do its work as the tension stays inside like I guessed it would. I get out as soon as I can, scrubbing the towel over me before throwing on my clothes with a viciousness I didn't know I could muster in this state.

When I find myself dressed and such I grab the toothbrush and take my time scrubbing my teeth. When I'm done the sink is a little mussed, but nowhere near as messy as yesterday. I leave the old clothes behind and walk into my room, not paying attention until the bed creaks and I'm frozen with my hand on the door. How someone escaped my notice is beyond me, and the knowledge sets me on edge before I even know who it is.

"Why do I always catch you just after you get out of the shower sugar?" Finnick's voice purrs from behind me and I whip around to catch him lounging on my bed. The sight of him makes me feel a lot of things, like anger and confusion...with a slight amount of relief. Mostly it's anger.

"What are you doing here? I haven't seen you for almost two days!" I ask him loudly and the smirk crossing his face makes me want to punch the hell out of him.

"Miss me that much sugar? I thought I should see what you plan on showing the Gamemakers. I had a break in the schedule to come before you left." He says in those Capitol tones that make my ears ache.

"I did not miss you actually. If we're being honest I'm doing fantastic on my own. Sorry you had to waste your 'free time' on me Mr. Odair." I snap at him and he lowers the ridiculous mirrored sunglasses he has on so I see his striking green eyes. They look a lot less arrogant than he keeps sounding, but I don't really know if I trust this boy. He hasn't really even given me a reason to.

"Aww come on Annie babe, of course you did. And I'm sure you want help and need it because I talked to Mags and she mentioned some things you said after training. Now, what are you showing for your private session?" He cockily tosses my way and I bite my tongue. The only way to get rid of him after all will be to play his game and answer his stupid questions.

" I'm going to show them a trident and a sword, maybe some knots since I'm so good at that." I say calmly and these words placate him a bit.

"Good, and you think these things can get you a good score?" He asks and I nod confidently.

" I **know** they will get me a good score. Don't worry about it." I tell him, wanting to get out of this closed space with him so close and apparently unpredictable as far as I have seen.

" I wanted to talk to you about your alliances as well, because I heard some things about how you all have been acting in training." He says, taking a step closer. I don't budge, curious as to how he heard...unless Mags has put him up to this.

" Is Mags concerned I didn't hash out all my problems yet? Well I have it figured out thanks, and I don't need you telling me to stay away, or leave or whatever you were going to say." I shoot at him and he looks a bit surprised by my defensiveness. I am too, but there isn't anything I can do about it, because just the thought of what I reasoned last night makes me want to cry.

"I...uh...yeah okay. I'm sorry I upset you. I just heard a rumor you were all calling yourselves the second career pack is all, and was wondering if the original knew anything about that." He says a little more softly than his previous Capitol tones. I back down too, feeling a bit better he wasn't trying to dig around my head like Mags had done. I'm not in the mood for moral questioning again today.

"Sorry, I've been up all night thinking on the stupid roof...and no they don't know that's what we call ourselves. We agreed amongst us we would publicize that in the interviews tomorrow. Catch them off their guard you know." I tell him and we both stand with our hands in our pockets for a moment and look at each other.

"Oh good. Yeah that's a really good plan. It sounds like you have everything figured out then for today. Uh...good job sugar." He gets out, not really good at hiding his surprise that I have this good of a plan. I choose not to respond to that.

So we stand in silence, staring each other down in the eye and waiting...for something. The heat is growing in here too, the longer we stand this way, and it's like lightening keeps striking me all over. It's uncomfortable actually, but I can't make myself leave his presence. I can't make myself leave him because there is something in his eyes that begs me to stay. Something in those green eyes is trying to tell me something, and I'm not sure he realizes he's doing it. So I observe him, realizing how when I originally thought he was standing straight, he is actually slouching. I see how the smirk on his face has dropped easily off, and the exhaustion is easy for me to see. Does he know that he has dropped his mask?

" So you trust me enough to drop the act? Or is the young man I met at the reaping the mask and the Sex God the act? Because it is either or and I'm tired of trying to figure out which." I toss at him and he cannot hide the startled look that crosses his face. It seems to have hit a nerve as he looks at me in amazement, as if I have uncovered a secret no one has been smart enough too.

When he doesn't respond to me right away I sigh and leave him behind in my room, hoping he would tell me exactly what his problem is. I hate to see those looks in his eyes, which is evidently true because I let down my guard around him every time. I'm such a fucking sap.

"Did he talk to you girl?" Mags' garbled voice asks from the table and I turn to her with a small nod.

"Yeah, he's all caught up on me, not to worry. I'm gonna go down there though, I don't want to be late and he looks like he needs some sleep." I say quietly and Mags raises her eyebrows in a question I am not sure I can answer...I'm not all that sure what she's even asking. So I leave without responding, hearing Finnick coming down the hallway and calling my name as the doors slide shut. I make one last piece of eye contact before it drops me down to the training center.

" Are you nervous?" Lena asks me from my right and I punch her shoulder lightly because I can see her smirk from the corner of my eye. It grows when she punches me back and I sigh when she begins to laugh with Oliver over my facial expressions.

" Yeah well some nerves are a good thing you know, and being Four doesn't give me much time to prepare my psyche." I tell them sternly as the boy from Three is called into the room. He looks near vomiting, and honestly I can't blame him one bit because I feel my stomach heaving against me. The only ones out of our group who look unaffected actually are Lena and Oliver.

" It's the best, you don't have to wait long but you aren't first either Cresta. Four would be my place if I wasn't from Seven." She says with the Lena shrug I have grown used to. Carrie doesn't speak at all, her and Winston's face white as a sheet and staring off into space. I decide talking to them might make me feel sicker, and responding to Lena is something I wish to avoid in case I puke.

"So we should meet up tonight after we get our scores I think. You know talk to each other before we go into the Arena." Oliver tosses out as the girl from Three is called.

"We should meet on the roof, the button with the thirteen on it. I went up there last night and it's the best place to not be over heard. No more whispering." I say, being sure to pay attention to Adam. He is staring at me while the others grunt in agreement and I find myself looking back at him, the fear in his eyes hidden but not enough to fool me. We hold each other there for a moment, until his name is called and he goes pale, shakily standing up on wobbly legs. He glances at me one last time before he enters the doors, his eyes searching mine for something I never knew he would be looking for. Something I never thought I would give him. I wish him luck in the silence only siblings understand.

Then he is gone and the spell is broken as quickly as it was cast. There is nothing we have to do with each other, there never has been in our entire lives. But I cannot deny that since stepping on that train there has been moments that concern me. Because in the end I know he'll have to die to save my family from disaster. It makes my heart ache, but it's true so I make small talk with Lena for the minutes leading up to my own private session.

"Annie Cresta. District Four" The automated voice calls over the speakers and they all look at me as I stand tall. The nerves cannot be allowed to eat me alive now, so I ignore them and keep walking with my head held high like when I walked onto that stage. The doors slide open for me and I go through, heart racing as the sliding sound echoes through the hollow space. I take a look at the Gamemakers who are taking me in with pleased smiles, waiting patiently for me to reach them. When I do stand in the spotlight I bow slightly and summon the most confident voice I can.

"Annie Cresta, District Four." I say clearly and even my confident tone surprises me, as well as them. I don't waste the confidence I have gained suddenly either, walking over to the tridents and relishing the feeling before turning on the holographic opponents. Then I forget about where I am, and I forget all my dreams. I just fight. I just fight like there is no tomorrow for me, and honestly I'm not sure there are many left.

After the trident I don't stop before picking up the sword and continue fighting the things they throw at me. I just keep going until the machine stops and all around lay virtual opponents. There isn't a scratch on me.

"Thank you very much Miss Cresta, that was quite a wonderful show." The Head Gamemaker says in awe from behind and I turn around to take one more bow. They all look at me with a mixture of absolute excitement and gut wrenching fear as I walk away. But really I want to curl up and sleep, not feeling proud about pretending to kill other people for their grading purposes.

The door slides open for me on the other side and I walk to the elevator in a haze of fear, shame, and anger mixed with exhaustion. It actually seems to be harder to hit the buttons while my brain withstands the storm, and as the elevator zooms up to the fourth floor I try to calm the tempest before it becomes too much. I have been there before, and it has been years since I let the storm overcome me. So here on the brink of death I cannot let the waves drown out my reason, unless I want to let Lena and them down. I take a deep breath and close my eyes tight.

When the elevator stops and I step off moments later the storm seems to have exited my brain and manifested in reality because the noise level is decibels above unnecessary. I wrench my head around, searching for the noise in panic as my instincts kick in, catching Adam out of the corner of my eye throwing a tantrum at Hannah. Mags tries to grab his arm, but she is on the ground in seconds while Grey cries out. I see Finnick for only a second before I am in the melee, taking his arm and shoving as hard as I can. My brother falls to the couch with a shout of surprise and I put up my fists, prepared for him to retaliate.

"Stay out of this! It isn't your problem!" He yells at me, standing up but taking in my stance and tacking a step back. I find it surprising really, but my fists don't go down and my eyes never grow softer. Instead I stare him down in the eyes, glaring into him until fear is the most prominent emotion.

"No, you back off, because this is ridiculous Adam. I told you this wasn't home damn it and this certainly isn't the time to be picking fights with the people getting you sponsors. Idiot." I spit at him and he takes two more steps back, then going past Finnick and into his room down the hallway. I put down my guard as soon as the situation has quieted, taking a deep breath and wishing I could be free of all these problems.

"Impressive fighting technique girl, and thank you for handling him. He was upset when he got here and I suppose we didn't help the situation." Mags garbles as Finnick picks her up and I'm curious as to where he was when Adam flipped shit on a puppy, a middle aged woman, and Mags. But he looks un-kept again so maybe he just got back from some of his ladies here in the Capitol. Either way it isn't my business and I want to sleep more than I want to ask him about his playboy status.

"Yeah, training really opens up the skill sets I had. Um...I'm going to go get some sleep okay, if it's alright could you come get me when the scores come on?" I ask and Finnick raises his eyebrows while Mags simply nods.

"Don't you want to talk about your session?" Gwendolyn asks and I shrug noncommittally as I step towards the hall.

"Uh...it went well. Yeah, so I...I'll see you all later okay. I'm really, really tired." I tell her and this makes Finnick's eyebrows raise even more. I ignore the look he gives me and turn on my heels, listening to Grey mutter about manners and Mags mumble about if I am telling the truth.

I shut the door as quietly and quickly as I can, throwing myself onto the made up bed and shutting my eyes. Flashes of the holograms turn into tributes behind my eyelids as soon as they close, bringing out a whimper from between my lips I regret. I bite my fist to stop the tears from escaping, willing my body to stop shaking and the pain in my chest to go away. The storm rages on though, and as I slip into unconsciousness I see Lena telling me about her favorite color being green as a tribute slices her throat.

_"Annie, Annie help me!" Lena screams as the dog mutt takes her down. I stop and run to her, the mutt howling in anger as I stab it with a trident in my hand. It launches itself at me but I shove it to the ground, stabbing the ugly thing in the heart. But Lena just keeps screaming my name while more mutts come towards us, too many for me to fight off alone. They fall upon me in droves and I scream in helpless fury, Lena continually yelling for me. Yelling...yelling...yelling..._

"Annie come on wake up!" A man's voice breaks through the nightmare scene and my eyes open wide and I sit up quickly. He backs up just in time to avoid my head, big hands holding onto my upper arms securely. I look at him with my wide eyes, taking in the reddish hair and green orbs that look scared as hell. I take a deep, shaky breath before speaking to him because I need to not sound like I want to die right now.

"I'm sorry...I-I just had a nightmare is all. Uh, is it time for the scores then?" I ask Finnick softly and he takes me in for a second before nodding easily, the smirk I have grown used to gone and set in a grim line.

"Yeah sugar, it's time to go. We thought we could have you both eat dinner before so that you can get to sleep earlier. The interviews are tomorrow you know." He tells me slower than normal, making sure I'm following along. I don't take offense verbally though and just stand up , his hands falling off my shoulders and onto his lap where he sits.

I don't wait for him to follow, or question the fact he got into my locked bedroom somehow while I slept. Instead I take my seat at the table in my chair next to Mags, Finnick sitting down across from me without a word next to my brother. Adam doesn't look up from the fish filet on his plate, and I don't say a word to him either. Instead I listen to Grey as she talks about the newest fashions hitting the Capitol after the tribute parade. I can't believe it was only three days ago though, and my mind wanders as she blabs thinking about the fact I am meeting my friends up on the roof after the scores. What will we say to each other? Will we all have good scores, or good enough to take on four kids who have been training for this moment?

I take small bites of my food while my mind goes like a tornado, around and around and picking up stray thoughts to add. Eventually however the food is gone, and the distraction I am in is no longer acceptable. I snap out of it to find Gwen still talking, Mags dabbing her face and Adam still pushing pieces about his plate. Finnick however is staring directly at me, and I feel the insane need to hide from the intensity I see there. What is up with this guy?

" Gwendolyn dear, I believe it's time we watch the scores. These folks need to know and be prepared." I hear a familiar voice say and turn in my seat to see Cinna's smiling face. I feel a small one come on and this seems to make him happy because he comes over to hug me. I didn't really realize how much I missed him I guess...

" Yes! Come on now kids, off to the couches with you!" Grey cries excitedly and we follow her. I sit on the floor again, relinquishing my seat as I did before. Mags gives me the same smile she did then, and Finnick sits down next to me. Our arms touch slightly and a tingle runs up me, making me inch away to make the feeling stop. If he notices, he doesn't show it. Instead he stares at the television that comes to life before our eyes, Cesar Flickerman alone on the screen. My stomach clenches at the sight of him.

"Welcome! Let's hear the scores for our wonderful tributes shall we! I don't want to keep you waiting too much longer." He says and I can almost hear the roar of the Capitol. I feel like I'm about to vomit when he continues talking.

"Faust from District One, 9. Quartz from District One, 8. Jackson from District Two, 9. Illyria from District Two, 10." He reads and I knew the scores would be that high. I knew they would be greater than anything I have imagined for myself. I see Adam gulp and I pull my knees to my chest in an unguarded moment.

"You'll both be fine I'm sure." Gwen sings, and Three has passed uneventfully.

"Adam from District Four, 7." Cesar says and I see him shove his fist in the air happily. Oh man, I think I might vomit all over this floor. Finnick grabs my hand and I don't let go.

"Annie from District Four...my ladies and gentlemen we haven't seen this since Mags from District Four, 11." He says on that screen and I am not on the floor any longer. I'm being held in Finnick's arms as he cheers, the rest of them yelling and hollering too. I got a higher score than everyone in the career pack...I beat the career pack.

"Oh wow Annie, that's brilliant. You are amazing!" Finnick said while he held me in the air. His eyes glowed with happiness, sucking me in for a moment where the silence is peaceful on my ears. We stared at each other, the tingles racing all around me for what seems like forever and a smile reaching his eyes. That is until Mags hugs me too, and the silence is brought back to celebratory noise.

"Yes girl, you have done better than we could have hoped. Congratulations young lady." She whispers and kisses my cheek gently.

"Oh, we have a winner I think. Both good scores but oh my goodness this could be our year!" Grey squeals happily, hugging her next. Cinna just smiles, letting me have a reprieve from all the closeness. Adam glares instead of smiling, boring into me and making the guilt bubble up. Yet he has no right to look at me that way for all that he has done to me in the past. No right...

When the congratulating ends I realize the other scores have passed me by, making me feel terrible I never got to see my allies. But as my floor retires to bed, Adam long gone to his room, I take to the elevator. The button glows in the night and I shove my finger into it, going up like a bullet from a gun. The cool air hits my flushed face with a beautiful sensation, and I can see Lena with Oliver waiting by the edge of a fountain. She looks up at me with her grey colored eyes, happiness over boiling at the sight of me. I give her a smile when it becomes infectious, knowing they have done well too.

"Seems our group has two 10s and an 11 for the Arena." Oliver says joyously. But there is a sadness there too. Carrie and Winston are not here...and that means one of two things. Lena seems to sense that I notice this.

"They already came up here. Seems our allies have decided to no longer be a part of this alliance. Carrie believes they would be better off alone since she got a 7 and he got a 5." She tells me in a clear voice. I feel as if I always knew this would happen, but the sadness still sits heavily in my stomach. We all give a moment's silence to our loss, but we need to regroup.

"Then let's come up with something tonight, we have a lot to cover." I say quietly and take my seat between them on the fountains edge. It reminds me of the parade chariot actually, except this time we aren't talking about home. We are talking about how to survive long enough to see it again.

"We take the cornucopia, or get in there quick enough to grab weapons. I say we grab the bow too. You know...in case we run into Carrie and Winston." Oliver speaks up and I think it is foolish to grab her a weapon. Yet...I'm positive I would have anyway.

"Yeah, it's not like we wouldn't grab it for her anyway. Eventually we could run into them. All we need to do is be sure when we're running away we grab a pack too." Lena agrees, crossing her arms and leaning on my shoulder a bit like she does when she's done talking. Oliver nods, standing up without us.

"I'm gonna go then. I'll meet you both up here the same time tomorrow night okay. But for right now I think sleep could do us good." He tells us, offering his hand to Lena.

"I'm gonna stay up here a while actually. It's pretty refreshing." She says and I nod to Oliver to tell him I am too. He smiles and leaves, the elevator taking him down and away. It is a long while Lena and I sit there after that, talking about normal things until we nearly fall asleep back to back and looking at the stars. With quiet goodbyes we leave one another at her floor, and I return to my own. The lights are all off, and there isn't any noise again...I never noticed how lonely it is in here.

It isn't until I lay my head down that I realize Lena just told two hours ago that me her favorite color was green.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

**Sorry for the late update. Life has been crazy with finals and Christmas. But let's get to the update shall we. No excuses.**

I wake up at ten in the morning feeling absolutely drained, my sleep scarce and full of nightmares. My throat is tense with the need to shed some tears but I swallow harshly, clearing my throat and looking around the empty room cautiously. There is no one in here today, only me in the lonely space with my hollowed chest aching for someone to hold me for a moment. I want to be weak for a second, be vulnerable and know someone will be there to catch me. However I have never had the leisure, and here in this place of death I know there is nothing like that being offered. So with a huff I throw my legs over the edge of my bed, straightening my back and putting my harden expression back on.

With swift and confident strides I grab comfortable clothes and take to the shower, using my now usual soaps and letting the hot water drench my sorrows and replace it with cold and calculating fury. I shove thoughts of killing my friends away and focus on getting through the interviews tonight. I need to impress these people as much as possible because that is the only way I will get enough sponsors to be secure in these Games. Stepping out of the shower I grab a towel and dress quickly, my mind going through what my angle should be. Do I act like the rebel I know I am? Tell them straight I will be taking down the careers? Will they ask if I am part of the pack? Or do I stay stoically quiet like at home? How much of myself is going to have to change?

I mull these things over while I pace through my room, looking out the window from time to time in desperation that the answer will appear. What would my friends say? Jack would tell me to flirt and the others would tell me to follow Jack. But then, Mr. Wheaton has always told me to be myself. He has always told me to hold my head high and let the world see me as me. Will these people love who I really am?

"Can I help you with whatever you're thinking about or do you have a handle on it sugar?" His honey voice asks from the far wall and I try not to show my startled reaction. How long has he been standing there, watching me pace about this stupid prison cell of glamour? I turn to him in an easy spin of my heel, his smug face holding the smirk I hate. His Capitol clothes show every part of him, making what should be distracting vile. He makes me want to vomit with the playboy demeanor and I let it show on my face when I speak.

"Sneak into my room again and I'm going to make you the first person I ever kill Odair." I tell him, my eyes as ferocious as the waves I call home. I see him back down a little, thinking I may just follow through with the threat. But this moment of weakness is short lived.

"Only one morning left sugar, I have to amuse myself somehow." He tells me in that soft Capitol purr he does so well. I falter for a second, realizing that tomorrow morning will be the last day I spend on the outside. Or it could very well be anyway. He looks as if he wants to die when he sees what he has said is insensitive. I watch the regret take over those green eyes, but I do not show the forgiveness they seek. No, there is no reason for me to forgive that particular comment.

"Yeah? Well then could you just let me enjoy it... my last morning? Or are you determined to annoy me as much as possible? Is that your mission Mentor?" I shoot at him and he is at a loss for words. I wait for a minute, letting him drown in his own stupidity before speaking up.

"So how do I do well in the interviews then Odair? What do you think my angle should be, because Mags must be talking to my brother about that right now." I ask and he seems to come back to reality. He takes a seat on the edge of the bed, brow furrowed while he stares at me in deep thought.

"Definitely strong, but Mags insists you be humble. She says it would suit you best, and be somber too. Apparently the old woman thinks you could pull it off." He tells me professionally and I am surprised Mags, in essence, has come up with who I should be. She wants me to be me, not a career, but the girl I am on the docks?

"She thinks that's how I am? Who I should be?" I sputter a bit and he nods with a soft smile, like the ones from the Justice building. It catches me a little, stunning me because I have not seen that look in days. It is genuine, so beautifully genuine I almost believe it.

"Yes sugar, she actually thinks very highly of you. Higher then I think you would of yourself." He scoffs and any look at the man I wish was here reverts back to the boy I distrust.

"Is there anything else I need to tell you about or are we done here? Can I sit in peace before the interviews?" I toss out and he looks slightly surprised I would blow him off, like he is every time I give him attitude. It gives me a little bit of happiness to know I throw him off really.

"Uh, do you want to practice answering questions? Do you just want to talk?" He asks me and I shrug. It would be good to practice really, but I don't like spending time with him. Is a precaution worth dealing with the cockiest ass I've ever known? I sigh lightly before answering.

"Ask away Caesar." I say and he smirks again before mocking that famous smile and adopting the well known tone of the master interviewer.

"Well Miss Cresta, how are you liking the Capitol?" He leans towards me, pushing out the invisible microphone with exuberance.

"It is certainly nothing like my home in District Four. My brother can attest to that. I never dreamed I would end up in a place like this." I answer without thinking. Finnick looks like someone slapped him, his mouth open a little and his eyes concerned.

"Watch the wording there. The last sentence could be...misunderstood by another. Get what I mean?" He orders, but I don't understand myself. I don't question him however and for the next five hours he tosses more at me, correcting my answers when needed and praising me when I succeed. After twenty minutes we laugh, joking here and there and the walls come down for the briefest amount of time as I respond to his eager questioning. It comes easy, spending time with the Finnick who doesn't flirt and act ignorant to those around him. It comes easy like it does with Lena, the simple yet deep conversation about my past. But it all comes to a shattering halt when Gwen comes knocking at three o'clock.

"Time to give her up to Cinna Finnick. She needs to get dressed and ready for her big moment tonight!" She calls through the wood and he is instantly the arrogant boy I knew before. It makes me feel like a victim of whiplash, the change is so severe and quick. It makes me feel alone all over again.

"Well sugar, it's been great. However I have a date to prepare for and you have a crowd to woo." He purrs with a wink. I don't say a word as he leaves, walking to the door where Mags is watching me sadly and Gwen moving from foot to foot in excitement. I harden my eyes after that, and follow them with my head high while Adam drags behind. He looks as terrified as he did at the Reaping, which is foolish. He needs the sponsors too, and the whole ride down to the basement those words bubble at my lips.

"Well Annie, here is where we leave you. I will look forward to seeing you after the interviews. Good luck my little star." Grey coos, hugging me close. A tear falls into my hair, dripping down my neck and igniting a fire in my chest. Mags smiles softly from over her shoulder, and I return it because I appreciate that they believe in me. I wish I believed as wholly as they did.

"Thanks, I look forward to it." I say in response, which makes her squeeze me before letting me go and walking off as she dabs her eyes. Adam rolls his, stalking off after our escort but Mags lingers.

"Remember girl...just remember where you come from. That way your answers will always be true, and you will have no regrets about tonight." She tells me in soft tones. I don't have time to respond before she is gone and I am alone outside the same room I had for the parade. I take a deep breath first, letting everything flow out of me and stepping into the squealing and clingy arms of my prep team.

For ten minutes they gush about my score, and how I look so beautiful. They weep with pride for me, saying over and over that District Four will have another Victor. I smile the entire time, letting their confidence pour in and fill the holes of doubt. But it turns out it doesn't fill them long and no matter how much they praise the holes stay open and bleeding. Cinna is the only reprieve I gain from this vicious cycle of hope and fear.

"Alright, less talking and more working. We have to get her ready as soon as possible." He orders, smiling gently at me as the prep team scatters to gather their supplies. I smile back, forced into a chair by Delano and taken apart so that they can rearrange my pieces. I close my eyes tight and let them work, listening to their talk about gossip in the Capitol. Most is frivolous but things catch my attention. Finnick has planned on going home directly after the Games, Cashmere (a Victor from One) and her brother Gloss are expected to have good odds for their tributes this year, and Johanna Mason has been collecting sponsors left and right these past few days. The rest of it runs through but doesn't stick, it only exits the opposite ear it entered and floats in the air like a buzzing fly. I wish I could swat them away.

When at last they have finished me, I squint in the harsh light after hours in the dark. The first thing I take in is their pleased stares, which bodes well I think since Cinna looks **extremely** pleased. Then I take a glance in the mirror sitting alone in front of me and I feel my throat clasp slightly. I vaguely recall telling Cinna about how I missed my pants, not being used to the flowing gowns and spiky heels. I told him about the beautiful blouse shirts women at the docks wore, simple and comfortable for a hard day's work and yet elegant. He had taken this to heart it seemed, but wove the ocean into it. My hair was woven with gorgeous shells and pearls, hanging around my face lightly swirled with pale greens and stunning blues. The shirt works from there like seaweed, clinging to me like I have just exited the water splashed with various sands and plants over my bare skin. The pants flow out from my legs loose and comfortable at the bottom but the top hugs my thighs and I see how while I sit it looks just like the fin of a mermaid. He made me a mermaid, but unlike one I have ever seen before. I have never been so lost for thanks with this blatant reminder of my home.

"I think she likes it." Cinna whispers and the other three agree happily. I only nod vigorously, knowing full well that if I open my mouth the tears will pool in my eyes. So I bite my tongue and smile slightly. He seems to understand.

"Well Mr. Stylist? Am I allowed to see my tribute?" I hear Finnick ask after the door is thrown open. Cinna's smile fades a bit at his arrival and after this morning I can't say I'm overly glad to see him either.

"Well she's done, and looking stunning might I add. What do you think Mr. Odair?" Cinna inquires coolly. Then those piercing green eyes are on me and I feel self conscious under his heated gaze.

He takes me in from my bare feet to my waved hair, eyes lingering places that cause my cheeks to flare red. Then his eyes meet mine and he looks lost, green unfocused and far away. I stare back for a minute, trying to figure out where he is but before I get a good grip Cinna is shoving his shoulder lightly and the haze is gone. Now all I see on his face is that infuriating smirk.

"You look ravishing sugar, I can hardly expect those Capitol men will be able to control themselves." He shoots at me but something like anger rages behind the mask which makes me even more confused. Why would he say that when it bothers him? I brush it off.

"Thanks I guess. Uh...are you supposed to take me somewhere?" I respond and he nods, the blue suit he's wearing suddenly catching my attention. It definitely fits in all the right places, I'll give him that. Even his bronze hair looks the right amount of messy. But the look he gives me, that seductive grin makes the sight vomit worthy again. I grimace in spite of him, and he drops the smile before taking my hand instead.

"Say bye guys, I gotta get sugar up to Caesar before the show starts." He tells my team and they hug me good luck. I make sure to give Cinna a kiss on the cheek to show my appreciation, which makes Finnick's hand grip tighter and pull me a little hard away from my friend. What the Hell is up with that? What's this guy's problem anyway? I give Cinna an apologetic look before we disappear around the corner. After that we step into the elevator I exited earlier, Finnick hitting a button I never actually paid attention to before. It doesn't sit on the pad like all the others.

"Was that button always there?" I can't help but ask and my mentor chuckles, making my cheeks flush in embarrassing shame.

"Yeah, so anyone can go to the stage whenever they choose. No sugar, this is something added while all the little tributes are getting prettied. It'll be gone by the time we go back upstairs tonight." He tells me a tad smugly and I narrow my eyes in anger. This only makes him smile wider, which only deepens the red on my face. The rest of the ride is spent with his occasional jab at my inattentiveness, while I silently wait for the elevator to please stop.

It eventually does, and together we walk through the other mentors and tributes until I see Mags in the crowd. She gives me a once over, her eyes happy. I was hoping she would like it, but it looks like Adam is determined to burn a nasty hole in my skull for standing here. I try to ignore him, looking ahead to the other careers as they stand in line...staring back at me. Okay, looking that way isn't going to do me any good apparently. I look behind me instead, seeing Lena and Oliver side by side and laughing about the wood themed outfits they are sporting. Johanna stands directly behind her sister, her gaze suddenly catching me in the act of staring. Her eyes dig into me, face in her grimace I see on T.V... until the smallest smile I have ever seen softens her gaze and mouth. Then it is lost and she turns away from me to speak with Blight.

"Do you remember how you should say things girl?"Mags asks from next to me and I look down while giving a nod. She grins, patting my straight back and tipping my chin up slightly. Without another word she is following the Male mentor from District Three away from us all, probably going to find seats. I turn to see where my mentor is, but he has already moved on, a girl tinted purple hanging off of him by the wall.

"Don't take it all so seriously kid. You could get through these Games a hundred times without his help anyway." A familiar voice says and Johanna Mason punches my shoulder like Lena always does before striding off after the other Victors. Wow, if I manage to survive this then I'll have some stories to tell on the boats...you know if I do get there. Hey, I apparently made pseudo friends with Johanna Mason and best friends with her sister. Fucking awesome.

Music blares, startling every tribute standing in line and bringing the reality of the situation crashing down. I'm about to be broadcast in front of the entirety of Panem with Caesar Flickerman...my stomach feels like shit all of a sudden. At this moment, it's kind of hard to tell if the fact I never ate dinner is a pro or a con. What would look worse all over our host, food or bile? I feel the sweat breaking out on my forehead in seconds.

District One is called, quickly followed by Two in twelve minutes. The makeup they used must be waterproof too, because the amount I am sweating should have made me look drenched by now. When District Three has passed I make myself look like a career as I have since my name was called, and it is called again much to my horror. Adam doesn't look my way once, his eyes cast down as I mount the stage alone.

The lights are blinding, blocking most of the crowd from my view. They cheer though, and in an act of pure adrenaline I wave my arms like a star as I walk to Caesar's waiting grasp. He takes my hand in his mint green one, the color of the year, and beams at me that famous smile. On a whim I return it which makes his eyes light up.

"Annie Cresta, how wonderful to have you here tonight!" He says cheerily, helping me sit down.

"It's wonderful to be here, thank you." I return, waving one last time to the crowd then turning my attention to him fully. He waits for quiet before launching into his questioning.

"So tell me Miss Cresta, how are you liking the Capitol so far?" He holds the mic near my face. Mags told me to be myself too, so I spin an answer I think is appropriate.

"It is honestly something I have never even dreamed of, but it has nothing on District Four Caesar. Although comparing them is like apples to oranges, both places so diverse from the other. Waves there, parties here but the same amount of noise" He looks impressed, chuckling which I hope is a good thing. When the crowd follows suit I know I said the right things.

"Well Well, beautiful, strong, and eloquent. Do the boys back home find that impressive too?" He asks, eyebrows cocked suggestively.

"Uh, I have to say no."

"No interesting guys in District Four?" I look at Finnick who is staring straight at the girl he was with earlier, except not her face.

"There are of course, but you already know that. You have one who lives here." I say with a smile. Mags' eyes widen considerably, and Finnick's attention is on me in an instant. Did he catch the disgust I tried to hide then? Caesar certainly didn't hear it.

"I think we can all agree on that one, Mr. Odair is quite the catch. How is he as a mentor? With that score he must be rather good." I draw a blank, because really he has done next to nothing for me. But do I say that, or do I lie? I look at Mags and she subtly shakes her head. Lie.

"Oh he did, I would never have been able to get an 11 without some help right?" He laughs that famous laugh and I laugh along with the crowd.

"Yes, the highest score we have seen in a long time. It was truly impressive Miss Cresta and I'm sure the career pack is glad to have you."

"I'm not part of the normal pack actually. I have one of my own." I say before I really take the time to think about it. His eyes grow big, curiosity burning in his gaze and the whispering in the crowd sounds like wind before a storm.

"Really? Who with?" Is it my place to say so?

"Lena and Oliver from District Seven." I tell him, missing the two names that should also be included. It hurts to think I want to be saying their names too.

"Three high scoring tributes striking off on their own. You really are exciting to say the least. I can't wait to see you in the Arena for sure."

"I plan on making it interesting." I tell him with confidence I use at the docks, his face turning into Jacks smiling one for the shortest instant. Be yourself Annie. Caesar looks as if he enjoys my playfulness.

"One more question then before you go. What was it like to be reaped beside your brother? People say you aren't fond of one another. Will it be easier since you are both distant?" He leans in closer and I feel the collective breath of the crowd draw in. I feel the tightness in my heart again like every time I think about this situation. It's inescapable...why would he ask me that?

"It's the scariest feeling I have ever had. I don't know what's going to happen, and it isn't easier if we're distant. He's only a year older than me..." I say in a soft voice, so unlike how I've been since arriving. I hear people crying and Caesar sniffles lightly before touching my shoulder lightly.

"I wish you the best of luck. Ladies and Gentlemen, Annie Cresta of District Four!" He yells and the crowd roars with cheers, my name on the lips of thousands. And I raise my arms again in homage, but not before looking into the camera and touching my fist to my chest in a salute we use on the docks. I hope they saw it, if they are actually watching this . I hope they know how much I love them, my siblings, the guys, and Mr. Wheaton. I walk off the stage with my head high and eyes hard. The cheers follow me down the stairs to an empty pocket where I find Grey squealing with joy.

"Oh sweetie! You really are something else. A fighter with kindness."She gushes and I let her hold me close. Mags is next to walk down another set of steps, giving me the widest smile I have ever seen her wear. She grips me tight, and I find myself sucking the comfort from it like a sea sponge. Adam is on stage by now, Caesar asking him about the career pack and such. He answers arrogantly like at school and at home which makes me roll my eyes a tiny bit.

"So what about you Mr. Cresta? What do you think about having your sister in the Games with you?" Cesar asks and I sharpen my attention, curious to see what he has to say. He starts by scoffing with a sneer.

"She might have said it was scary but this is the Hunger Games. I'm here to win and no little girl is going to stop me from doing that. If I have to then she'll fall by my hands because only one of us gets to go home." He tells the host, who looks almost angry and offended. I only feel the sweet sting of betrayal burning in my veins, just in time for Finnick to stumble down the steps Mags came from... laughing with two Capitolites. I don't realize my feet are moving me away until Mags and Cinna, who has just arrived, call after my retreating form. Adam tells them to let me go in his snide voice, a resounding smack the last noise I hear before the doors to the elevator slide shut. I smash our number while I shove back the stupid clenching of my stomach, but the burning in my eyes is the hardest to ignore.

The floor comes into view and I briskly walk to my room in the darkness, throwing the door open with more force than I had originally intended. I slam it and begin to strip my clothes as quickly as possible then grabbing a pair of blue lounge pants and a green top before getting in the shower. I speed through the process, wanting to get the night off of me as fast as I can. But when the soap is gone I smell home in the steam, which makes me stand under the spray longer than I had intended. The tears never drip down my cheeks but the hot water does slowly so after a few moments I jump out, somewhere inside me telling me I may have had my last smell of the ocean. I try to ignore how heinous that makes me feel.

Instead I dress and press my ear to the door, checking that everyone seems to be occupied because I heard the ruckus while I stood under the water. I hear Gwen in her room, Mags' voice carrying from Adam's room far from me. I don't expect to be seeing Finnick again before I go either, so on quick and quiet feet I run through the hall and into the main room where the lights are already off. Good, this gives me a good cover to reach the elevator. That is until the doors slide open and Mags stands there watching me get on. I ignore the concerned look she gives me, pushing the button for the roof.

I need air, because right now my future is suffocating the living Hell out of me.

The cool breeze hits me in my face nicely but the lights of Capitol celebrations ruins any chance of seeing the stars. Somewhere inside me I was hoping it would be sunset still though, to give me the chance to live my possibly last real evening. I wanted to at least glimpse those stars up there most however...to see something my brother and sister could be looking at right now. I clear my throat of the thought, looking around to see the fountain empty of my allies. A small piece of paper reads only a few words: stick to the plan. Johanna must have wanted them to sleep instead, which makes more sense than what I'm doing right now.

I take a stroll through the plants without sitting on the fountain this time, my bare feet taking me to the ledge where I can see all of them partying. They look like ants but the noise the winds carries to me suggests they are much bigger than that. I square my shoulders a tiny amount, feeling powerful way up here and looking down on them. For once I would like to be the one on top, I'm tired of looking up at everyone.

"Shouldn't you be asleep sugar?" I hear a familiar voice ask and I glance behind me to see Finnick standing there , his suit still on and tie haphazardly undone. Yet his eyes are so sad in that moment I have to answer him even if I want to be in peace for my last night.

"I wanted to get some air. I won't be getting much where I'm going." I answer in a resigned tone. He walks to stand beside me and I am no longer the tallest, which means I'm looking up again. It saddens me more than it should.

"You'll have some when you win. You'll have more than you could ask for." He whispers and I don't miss the regret there.

"I suppose." Is all I say, making him look down at me with curiosity. There is a beat of silence before he talks again.

"Do you want to win this thing?" I am taken back by that question, offense written all over my face.

"Of course I do, you understand that by winning I can provide the best for my siblings? I can make their lives better than they have ever imagined...but there is always the chance I'll slip and fall. I can't let my dreams cloud the reality of the situation I'm in Odair." I shoot back and he is quiet this time for five minutes or more before speaking to me in hushed tones. Different tones than I have ever heard Finnick Odair use.

" What do you dream about?" He asks softly into the wind. I look at him annoyed, but see this desperation in his eyes. Something is begging me to say I even have one...Like he wants to know what it's like. But there is no silver lining in my world, no dream for myself that is feasible in this moment in time. So I pause in opening my mouth because honestly I think what I would say normally is the last thing he needs to hear, so I say the one thing I have never told a soul.

" I dream about being someone" I say quietly, which is strange for me. It sounds as if I am a child, and he cocks one eyebrow on that pretty face of his. I hope he doesn't notice how vulnerable I feel.

" What do you mean?" And I realize he was confused about what I said and not how. Yet sadly I thought he may understand what I meant from the glimpses I've seen. I suppose I was wrong in taking that leap of faith because what does Finnick Odair know about wanting for anything, when he has everything. I turn my head away so he cannot see my disappointment.

" If you have to ask, then you'll never know" I reply, turning from the city lights that burn my eyes and to the dimmer elevator. He spins then, looking surprised that I would just leave when I see him from the closing doors. But there is also something else there in those depths; a deep hurt that I seem to have caused inside him. But I stand by my words, because if he has to ask what it means then he will never fully grasp my dream. A dream I plan on making a reality in these Games...for my siblings.

The ride is shorter than before it seems, and when it ends I go slowly to my room because I want to take in all of this. Tomorrow I will be beside the two people I trust here with all my being in a fight to the death, perhaps even killing two others I wish were with us. I pretend that the idea doesn't affect me as much as it actually does and wish I haven't been doing that so much as of late. Instead I lay upon my bed in the quiet and stare at the ceiling, the clock beside my bed blinking 2:30 AM. In the faint glow I close my eyes, clenching them there as I beg for sleep to consume me for a few hours because these thoughts are going to kill me before any tributes.

The last time I look at the clock it tells me 4:45 through the haze of exhaustion.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

A soft hand strokes the hair from my forehead when I grudgingly come too. My eyes are still closed tight and my body feels like a jelly fish as the person plays gently with my hair. It feels wrinkled and rough, a slight humming making my pulse calm and pound even. I don't want it to go away like I don't want to wake up.

"Come on then girl, you need to get up. It's almost time to leave and we need to get you in some comfortable clothes." I hear Mags tell me softly and I sigh sadly before opening my eyes wide. She has a weathered smile on her face while she strokes my hair one last time before standing up. I sit up and toss my legs over the edge of the mattress, relishing in the soft sheets and watching Mags dig through my dresser until she holds a plain blue shirt and tan pants. I stand when she turns around to face me and walk over to take the clothes from her hands gently, only speaking when she turns to leave.

"Thank you...for everything. I'm sorry I was a little snippy that day, the other day rather. I...I really owe you for looking after me. I'm not completely used to that kind of thing." I say in as clear of voice I can manage. She faces me again slowly, raising a hand to my cheek and smiling softly into my eyes. For a moment there is only silence until she clears her throat.

"If I ever had children Annie Cresta, I would hope that they would be as kind and generous as you. I wish you all of the luck in the world my dear." She tells me in the most sincere tone I have ever heard. It is the words though that take me by complete surprise and before I can respond she is gone from my room, gone for what could be forever. I clutch the clothes to my chest in desperation for her comfort until I realize she won't be coming back. Why would she come back stupid?

"That means...so much." I confess to the empty space, turning to the bathroom one last time and closing the door to change. The shirt slips easily over my head and feels so soft on my skin that I hug my arms around me. It feels like...I don't know. I only wish someone real could hug me because pieces are starting to gently slip away.

I sigh with the thought, pushing it away and squaring my shoulders for the millionth time in my life. I leave the pajamas folded neatly on my bed, quickly scratching a note of farewell for Hannah. I hope it's enough because that's all I have in me to do. I'm so tired of goodbyes it's sickening and there are so many out of my control to come. At the very least I can manipulate how this one pans out.

With that I take my leave and turn the light off, never looking back. I clutch the necklace around my neck, the anxiety of leaving reminding me of its familiar comfort. It has been days since I thought about the delicate spiral of shell on my throat, but right now it seems to be anchoring me here. I press it to my heart and keep walking, Cinna's voice carrying from the dining room. When I step out he looks sad to see me there and it hurts me he has become close to someone on the brink of probable destruction.

" Here I thought you were never coming out. Your brother was apparently being difficult this morning and I was afraid you would be too." He tries to joke and in return I force a smile. Grey, who is standing excitedly by his side seems to buy the cheery act.

"Oooooohhhh I'm so glad to have had you as a tribute. You were an absolute dream Annie Cresta...I only hope that you will be as good a Victor. All my money will be on you sweetie." She tells me with tears pooling in those bright eyes of hers. I give her the most genuine grin I can muster and when she grips me tight in an embrace I find my own arms snaking around her. A hug is a hug and I so desperately want one that even Gwen offers some comfort. It doesn't last however and she is bustling away with hurried luck for my brother. I hear her talking to Mags in the hallway for a second before I turn to Cinna with a heavier heart than I have ever had.

"So...where to now?" I ask in a smooth tone. He sees right through the act but doesn't call me on it.

"You said goodbye to everyone you wanted to? Because if that's the case then we need to get going. Your brother should be right behind us." He tells me in a comfortable voice and turns for the elevator. I follow but not before I turn around to look for...my mentor. He is nowhere to be seen and deep down I feel the knife stab my heart hard. He has abandoned me then, or at least doesn't have the decency to say farewell. My eyes burn when I turn around and join Cinna and he moves to press the button. I hear a door slam before they close and Gwen screaming a little which gets my attention.

"Finnick Odair where are you running to?" She yells but there is no answer for her specifically.

"Wait! Wait I have to...HEY!" I hear and the doors are sliding shut when he peels around the corner dressed in the suit from last night. But he doesn't make it before we go down and his face is enough to make me take beck what I thought...or only a tiny bit. Cinna stays quiet, not commenting on the fact my mentor is a mess and couldn't say his last words on time when we live on the same floor. I'm honestly ashamed by it really, and so he pats my shoulder in understanding but does not comment. I'm glad.

When we disembark there are white suited Peacekeepers waiting in the lobby for us, other tributes an stylists being ushered outside and onto a hovercraft I see parked there. The adrenaline starts to pound in my veins with the sight and it becomes easier to keep my head up when a man with a gun leads us both to the doors and up the metal ramp. I take a seat on the end and Cinna sits on my left while a woman grabs my arm and shoves a big needle into it. Whatever it was hurts like hell for a second before disappearing under the skin and I look at her accusingly to which she replies _tracker_ and walks to the next kid. Cinna holds my shoulder after the restraints are in place and I let it go, the glare deepening when Adam boards and sits across from me. I feel his eyes boring a hole in my skull but I don't look at him, he doesn't deserve the privilege.

Lena and Oliver are the last to board and we share a glance before they seat themselves next to Adam. Lena's eyes linger to my left, past Cinna in my row so Iean forward to catch a glimpse at what has caught her attention. Winston and Carrie are sitting about five down from me, talking quietly together and not looking in our directions. When I turn back Lena makes eye contact with me and I give her a sad grin. She returns it and the hovercraft begins its journey to the Arena, far away from the Capitol. The other tributes are silent, we all are, as the ride goes on and in twenty minutes before the craft lands on the ground and the metal ramp slides downward into a hall. The restraints come loose and I throw it off with ease, losing my friends in the throng that exits. Cinna takes me by the hand and leads me to a room around the corner, gently pushing me in and closing the door silently behind him. I look around the small space, the dark place holding only a table and two chairs with clothes on it and a clear tube that I assume will take me up into the Arena itself.

"You need to eat something before you go in Annie. How about you take a seat and I get you some eggs. Would you like that?" He asks in muted tones and I nod my agreement. He slips out of the room for a few minutes, leaving me to wander the tiny cell. At least it feels like a cell, more so than any room I have been in here. I finger the clothing, its light fabric tells me it could be hot but the heavier jacket alludes to colder temperatures. So hot days and cold nights await me, and water by the look of the cloth. It is made of the same material out fishing pants are, the kind that repel water. This gives me little comfort however because these will not be the waters of home. No this water will be dangerous and filled with mysteries. I hate mysteries.

The door reopens and Cinna walks in with a cup of orange juice and a plate of eggs still steaming. He sets it down and motions for me to sit, which I do without argument and I dig in, watching him look over the clothes with interest in his eyes. I put down the fork on the now empty plate, taking a swig of juice before speaking for the first time since we left.

"I looked them over, and I know it's a water proof fabric. I figure it'll be cold too, at night that is and hot during the day" I say and he grins broadly at me in return.

"Very good, I think the same thing. Be prepared for it too, because there is no telling if the water will be salt or not. Mutts can depend on things like that." He instructs and I take it to heart.

"Yeah, it would be painfully ironic if the tribute from Four who works on a boat gets eaten by a fucking Shark." I chuckle and even though we know it is a possibility, we laugh anyway. We laugh and imagine it isn't a distinct possibility. That is until he stands and I do too.

"Get changed real quick okay, I'll be right outside." He orders and I pick up the clothing as he leaves. In the silence and as I dress I think of Finnick for some reason. I think of what he would have said if he had come out in time and what I would have if I had the chance. Would he have said he thought about last night? Would he have hugged me? Would he have called me sugar and smirked when I got angry?

"Tributes, two minutes until launch." A voice says over a speaker somewhere in the room. Cinna comes in just as I shrug on the jacket, and we stare at one another in a silent conversation. I step into the now open tube and still we say nothing, the open space closed when he hugs me quickly and the glass slides shut. It isn't until the ten second mark he actually says something though.

"Good luck." Is all he utters.

"Thank you. All of you." I whisper and the floor begins to move ever upward, taking him out of my sight and into a blinding light.

I blink hard and clear my vision, the first thing I see being the huge cornucopia shining in the sunlight. I see the weapons and supplies scattered everywhere, but I already know what to grab for so I search for Lena and Oliver in the circle. Oliver is two tributes right, split from me by the boy from One and the Girl from Five. Lena is directly next to me on the left, the rest of the career pack scattered on all sides, none really close to the other. I instead take to looking at the surroundings, seeing a lake to the east under a mountain and the rest a dense forest where a river runs from. One look at my companions says we are taking to the cover of the trees. I look to Lena's side again to get a baring of who is there and familiar eyes catch mine.

Adam is three away from me on Lena's side however, and in the last twenty seconds we make eyes contact before the buzzer goes off and I take off for the mouth, Lena and I outdistancing any other tribute. We arrive together, but no words are exchanged as I tear a nice size sword from the pile and a set of knives attached to a black pack. She swings two axes onto her back in a fancy holster as Oliver reaches us next and picks up two of his own. I take a glance outside and see the careers are fast approaching, so in a haze of emotions I grip the sword and run past my allies to defend them from the onslaught.

The girl from One is the first to taste my steel. She descends upon me while trying to reach Lena and the sword cuts through her abdomen like butter. The boom of her canon is the first I have heard and Lena grabs onto my arm and tries to pull me away from the fray after Oliver in the panic that ensues with the noise. But I run instead for the bow I see to my right, picking it up and the quiver before taking off after my allies into the dense trees ahead. The canons begin to fire and I know the rest of the careers have set upon the remaining tributes, but I don't turn away from Lena's back and let the screams fly through my ears in our retreat. After what seem like a half hour we halt our jog, taking refuge in a small clearing by the river side. I lean against a tree trying to get my breathing under control while Oliver takes a seat on a log and Lena simply tosses her things to the ground followed by herself.

"Well, we made it past the bloodbath at the least, and thanks to Annie there's one less career to worry about." Oliver says after some silence, a smile on his face as he sets about searching his pack.

"Hell yeah, our girl got the first kill. Can you say sponsors out the ass?" Lena says from her place on the ground and I can't help but feel a little good about myself. But there is something in me that is dying slowly, the part that watched the light leave her eyes. I killed someone and really...I took a life but that's...that's the game.

"Got that right. What did you get in your pack Annie?" Oliver asks, snapping me out of the guilt hole I had been digging for myself.

"Uh, not sure. What did you get in yours?" I throw at him lightly as I take inventory of my backpack.

"I got a bottle with water, a water cleaning kit, a sleeping bag, some jerky, and some rope." He says in a sort of disappointed tone. I understand that as I search through my bag.

"Hey, at least your water bottle has water. I have a medical kit though, and a sleeping bag. There's some more jerky in here too, and a flashlight with matches." I tell them and Lena scoffs like we were still in the training center.

"Yes because we should walk around at night with a flashlight and hope the other tributes run from the light." She laughs, her voice dripping with sarcasm. Oliver and I chuckle as well which can hardly be heard over the running water.

"Same with a fire, I mean who would light one in the dead of night? That's one of the first things they told us in training remember?" Oliver jokes and we all nod along, which hits us all at about the same time and we go quiet. We sound like the careers, the people we hate so much. The joking about other tributes stops after that. Instead we get to readying a campsite, Oliver climbing the trees to set up and clearing out stray branches as Lena and I go through her pack. She has a sleeping bag of her own and some dried fruit, along with water and a filter system. We hand the bags and rope up to Oliver, setting our sights on the river. With three full water bottles we sit down to a dinner of jerky and fruit while the sun sets, looking to the sky from our tree camp to see the Capitol seal.

The first face is the girl from one and it makes me cringe, followed by both from three, the girl from six, the boy from eight, the girl from nine, both from ten, and finally the boy from twelve. In the end, we are down to 15 tributes remaining, which isn't as good as it has been in the past few years. I don't dwell on the issue however, instead I clear my throat to ease the tension.

"We should hunt for food tomorrow, maybe try to find Carrie...I got her bow." I say to the night air.

"We could, but only if she doesn't have a weapon. We don't want to give her any opportunities." Oliver says from the branch below Lena and I. The point is hard to ignore.

"He's right, we are in the arena now. The both of them can't exactly be trusted." Lena agrees and rolls a little to face me before closing her eyes. Oliver says nothing and when I peak down I see he too has closed his eyes and sleep taken him. I do not close mine though, and in the night I am the only one to see the fire beneath out tree, and I am the only one to bear witness to the girl from twelve's demise by my brother's spear. I am the only one who sees them laugh, unaware that above them sat their greatest competition. I am the only one who sheds a tear for the poor girl who was only cold and used a discarded match of mine to get warm. I am the only one who feels responsible.

Nine days later we are travelling through the forest when things start to deteriorate. The only deaths in the sky have been the boy from nine and the girl from twelve since she died after the anthem was played. I never did tell Oliver and Lena about it, what I saw on the forest floor. Instead I had pushed it to the back of my mind, and together we have been living decently from what we hunt down on the hot days. Lena and I play games to pass the time and every once in a while, more often now, the three of us seem to have forgotten where we are. By day five in the Arena it's a hell of a lot like camping.

It's overly hot today, the sun beating through the trees with the mountain at our back covered in snow. We don't bother wandering that far, remembering the mountain in the last quarter Quell and how it exploded into a fiery inferno. No, Lena and I agreed we should follow the river and stay near it and Oliver eventually succumbed to the fact it was the best place for us. So we head towards the dam in the distance little by little, hoping it will yield something we can use. Secretly however I think we all hope Carrie and Wilson will be there.

"I think it keeps getting hotter in here. They must be getting restless for some action." Oliver says from the front of our tiny group. I can't help but agree, my sword hand itching for the moment a trap is sprung. Lena doesn't seemed concerned, but there is a natural defense making her shoulders tense and her hands twitch.

"Yeah, I think you might be right about that. I have this feeling we may be seeing the other pack sooner rather than later." I tell him from behind Lena. He glances back with a smile and I return it because it is nice to have someone else concerned. Lena scoffs.

"Why would they want us to fight now? I mean let's be honest and say we both are the finale." She laughs. Oliver and I have a hard time arguing with that logic. that is until a scream rips through the woods to our right, away from the river and towards what we know is a clearing. Without hesitation Oliver takes off after the noise and I run right behind him while Lena brings up the rear. I grip the sword in my hands as we travel quickly and quietly through the brush, and my stomach clenches terribly when I recognize the screaming voice.

"Please...Please don't do this." She cries and I clutch the blade in my hand, that same adrenaline to protect my friends in the cornucopia igniting. Oliver feels it too when he gives the go ahead to burst through the trees on his signal. Lena takes hold of her axes and I make ready my coiled legs for the jump that puts me on top of the nearest attacker. It is the girl from five, and from what I can hear and make out the rest of the careers are tormenting Carrie as Wilson whimpers in his District partner's grip.

"Yeah, and what's going to stop me huh? I guess you should have stayed with your little friends." The boy from one growls as the girl from two slices something off from the view I have. My stomach rolls but I swallow the bile, very glad we have had nothing to eat yet. Lena too looks green from right next to me but across the brush I see Oliver is angry, the fire in his eyes alight with primal fury.

"Take off her ear next, that'll really make her squeal." The boy from two says with bloodlust thick in his voice and my brother agrees with the glint I have seen in Dad's eyes too many times. When I look back across I see Oliver staring me down, and in that look I tell him that it's time. With a nod of his head I leap from my perch and onto the girl from five who screams like a small child at my sudden appearance. Oliver is not far behind and his one axe flies from his hand and into the boy from two's chest quicker than I could have thought possible. The canon is loud when he falls to the ground and in the confusion I toss Carrie her bow before shoving down the girl from five. Wilson rolls away in time to avoid my sword stabbing into the socket of her left eye and Carrie's arrow that pierces her heart. Her canon's boom rattles my ears and ignites the fire in my blood and I turn to the girl from two in a spur of adrenaline when another boom echoes in the small space. Lena screams behind me and I glance in Carrie's direction to see Adam behind her but what really gets me is the trident points protruding from her chest. What happened...what?

Oliver roars in anger, his guard let down for the smallest of moments in his fight with the huge boy from One. It is all the time he needs to raise that mighty sword in his hands, and all the time he needs to separate Oliver's head from his body. Lena cries again in absolute agony and I feel my head buzz with his canon, but there is something in my peripheral vision that makes me look away from the spurting blood and I raise the sword in time to block a knife from Two. Her eyes widen when I turn towards her with my weapon raised, and even Adam looks terrified when my gaze falls upon them both. She recovers a little quicker however and with teeth bared I growl at her when she charges. With one swing her arm flies away in a shower of blood and torn muscle, her screaming louder than even Lena's wails of sadness. I turn to the boy from One while she writhes in her own blood on the ground.

"Come on then. You want to fight me too?" I ask in a voice I never knew I had and he runs to the trees, he and my brother disappearing without an answer into the darkness. I smile like the Cheshire Cat, spinning on my heels to face the girl from Two I have watched act like the best since the moment she was reaped. There is no confidence in her eyes anymore, it has been replaced by blind fear as she looks up into my face.

"It was their idea to follow them. W-we thought they would lead us to you. B-b-but...please." She begs and if I were the same person from home I wouldn't have ever thought to kill her. But I am not the same person, and I have no pity for someone who tortures their prey before killing it. I have no compassion for monsters. My sword goes through her chest and in seconds her canon sounds, mingling with the whimpers of Lena and Winston.

I take a survey of the situation now while they hold onto each other because right now I have never felt more numb. I look at the three dead careers first, searching their pockets and finding some jerky, matches, and knives hidden in jackets. I don't take anything else though, and in a moment of gentleness I lay them all in more comfortable positions. Then I have to turn towards my friends.

Carrie lays face down in the dirt, the trident still sticking out of her back in gleaming gold. Had this been a sponsor gift? It certainly looked expensive and I do not recall seeing one when we took the cornucopia. In fact, I saw him with the spear on his back...the one he killed an innocent girl with in cold blood. Yes, this was a sponsor gift, which have been non-existent to our group since this excursion began. I hide the hurt on my face when I try as gently a possible to take it out of her. It slides out easily, slicked by her blood.

I get on my knees after that and turn her over, my hands soaking in her blood by the time I have her bow and arrows placed nicely over her heart. I softly close her eyes to the blazing sun and give a moment of silence. Then I move on to Oliver, his headless corpse playing games with my mind. Lena chokes on sobs when I touch him, flipping his body over so if his head was still attached he would see the sky. I am not sure what to do about his head, but I take off the pack and toss it aside before putting the axe back in his hand. When it is all done the two's blood is mixed on my palms, coating the arms of my jacket and drying in what I imagine to be some kind of armor. Or that is what I take with me in my heart when I grip his pack and shuffle to the broken people by the forest's edge.

"We have to go guys, so the bodies can be picked up." I tell them in a solemn voice. Lena looks up at me with red and watery eyes, pleading with her gaze to do...I don't know. Winston gives me the same desperate look and I realize that someone has to be strong. And I have proven that person is me. I am the leader now in Oliver and Carrie's forced absence...I am so terrified I could cry.

"What are we gonna do Annie?" Lena asks after some moments of silence, and so I square my shoulders and stand taller which seems to make them feel better.

"Now we hunt them down. We hunt them down and we make them pay Lena. can you do that for me?" I inquire, holding out my hand for her to take in a sweaty grasp. I see the familiar strength begin to come back when we are connected and she grins.

"It would be my genuine pleasure Annie Cresta." She whispers in a voice of steel and I pull her onto her feet before offering my hand to Winston. He stares at it for a second until he wordlessly grips my palm with his. After the packs are back on we take our path back to the river and I go to the water's edge to rinse my hands as the other two prepare some food Carrie had trapped before being ambushed.

The water runs cool over my harden hands, like the grief washes onto my hardened heart. There are only ten tributes left wandering in this arena, two of them my allies, two of them my enemies, and the rest standing between me and home. But I don't care if it's me who walks out, only that Adam tastes the coppery steel of my blade before my demise. Because that is what he deserves...I look into the hole between rocks where I see a glint of a camera and look directly into it.

"I know you gave him this trident, and I know you probably have given him other things dear mentors. I don't know why, but I know that much. Listen to me closely now however, because what I'm about to say is important. There is no way I'm letting him leave this place, and there is no help you can give that bastard to save him. I won't let you." I say coldly without another word.

That night, nestled in the tree while Lena and Winston sleep above me I hear the tinkling of a sponsor gift, the container dropping directly into my lap. It is followed by another, and then a third which sparks my interest. Inside the first I find a small piece of chocolate, three slices in all and a note that reads of thanks and is signed Cecelia 8 only. I smile into the sky and hopes she hear my quiet thank you. then I open the second and find three pieces of bread and two notes from Johanna Mason, another of thanks for me and another sealed letter for Lena that I set beside her piece of chocolate.

The last I open and see there is only a single piece of paper, and written upon it is only a few words in shaky writing that makes my blood boil: _It wasn't from us_. I shove it into my pocket and put the other gifts into my bag for the morning while I whisper more thanks to seven and eight. Then I dutifully keep watch, the words of my mentors buzzing in my head like an irrefutable haze. If it wasn't from them...then who gave my brother the trident he used to kill my friend?

**There will be two more chapters of the Arena, or they will be combined to make them longer. I know her district partner is supposed to be beheaded but I have other plans. And another note, Annie will not be bat shit crazy here. I believe she has PTSD, which is why she sees these things sometimes. Please be patient and enjoy the story:)**


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